“Tempus Imperfectum” by Al Song (part 3 of 3)

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You’re listening to The Voice of Dog. I’m Khaki, your faithful fireside companion,

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and Today’s story

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is the last of three parts of

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“Tempus Imperfectum”

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by Al Song, who is a musician,

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furry writer, and polyglot.

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The red kangaroo also assists as an editor at Thurston Howl Publications.

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He has been published in multiple anthologies

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including Fang 8 and Roar 9. “Tempus Imperfectum” was originally published in Tales from the Guild –

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World Tour by FurPlanet,

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and you can find more of his stories on FurAffinity

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and SoFurry. [if this is the second or third entry] Last time, [Lorenzo,

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Volker, and Massimo had an emotionally charged lunch

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after a less than savory encounter with some bullies took place

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in the city of Stuttgart.]

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“Tempus Imperfectum”

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by Al Song, Part 3 of 3

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On the way back, Lorenzo stayed quiet as a cloud of gloom surrounded him.

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During the train ride,

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he stared out at the indifferent world rushing past him.

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Volker tried to console him,

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but the otter uttered only one word responses.

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At Lorenzo’s apartment, the two teens sat on the lumpy corduroy couch

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and watched television.

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Lorenzo stared into the colorful box,

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his ears drooping, but wasn’t paying attention to anything.

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He leaned against Volker,

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who stared down at his boyfriend and rubbed his side. “Are you

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feeling any better now?” Volker asked. Lorenzo took a second to think about the next words that would exit his mouth

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and replied, “No, I’m still feeling guilty.”

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He took a deep, sharp breath.

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“I’m still upset at those guys that were making fun of us and that old person who was yelling at me.”

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“Does it matter though?

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I mean, I guess it does, but we don’t have to deal with them anymore,

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and we don’t have to listen to them.”

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“It’s not going to be the last time though,” Lorenzo said.

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“Shouldn’t things like this make us stronger?”

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“I don’t feel like it’s making me any stronger.

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stronger.” The otter sighed and then let out a groan of frustration.

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“I’m tired of people harassing me.”

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“I know people aren’t the most open-minded here in the rural world,

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but at least we’re not being killed on the streets or jailed for just being ourselves, right?”

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“Even though I’m not dead or in prison,

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it’s still not okay and it still hurts.”

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“I know it does.” Volker held his boyfriend.

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Lorenzo leaned into the badger

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and closed his eyes.

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“Ever since I was little,

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I never felt like I really fit in or like I was actually a part of a group.”

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He took a breath and sat back up.

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“When I moved from southern Italy to Venice

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I didn’t have a lot of friends and some of the other kids would make fun of me

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because of my dialect.

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They made it seem as if I was a stupid or lazy person

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because of how I spoke and where I came from.”

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He looked at the speckled carpet.

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“Back then, I wasn’t sure if I had any real friends.

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When we moved here

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I had to learn a whole new language.

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Other people would make fun of me because I was still learning how to speak German,

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and even now people still make fun of me because I have an accent.

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There were also the people who harassed me because I’m a foreigner.

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Today I just wanted to have my dad speak German because it would make us seem less foreign.”

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Volker gently rubbed Lorenzo’s back.

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“It’s not like people can look at you and be able to tell that you’re not German.”

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“I know that, but when I speak I sound different.

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After they hear me, people know that I’m a foreigner.”

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Lorenzo stared at the ground again.

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“You don’t sound funny.

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I think your accent is molto sexy,”

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Volker said, giving Lorenzo a playful look.

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Lorenzo gave a small chuckle but sighed again.

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“But that’s the thing.

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I have an accent and that makes me different.”

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“We’re gay, that already makes us different.

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Everyone’s different.”

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“I know, but it’s not like being gay makes it any easier.

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I’m glad I’m gay since you’re my boyfriend,” he said

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and squeezed the badger’s bicep.

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“You’re so big and strong.”

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“Aw, cutie,” Volker said, giving Lorenzo a small kiss on his furred cheek.

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“Does it matter what people think?”

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“I care about what you think.” “Well,

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I’m not just anyone.

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I’m your friend and your boyfriend.

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And Lorenzo, you shouldn’t yell at your dad like that,”

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the badger said gently.

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“I know.” “Seeing you shout at your dad was kind of surprising.

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I’ve never seen you get angry at him or anyone.

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I mean, my parents get on my nerves a lot but I don’t yell at them,

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at least not like that,”

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Volker said as he tried to make the last part sound like a joke.

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Lorenzo looked even more ashamed

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and turned his head away.

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Volker rubbed his back again.

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“I’m not trying to tell you that you’re a bad person for yelling at him,

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but it just didn’t seem fair or okay.”

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“I guess I could have just politely told him.”

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“Or you could have just told him the truth

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about what was going on.”

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The badger gave the otter a reassuring look and a hug.

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“Yeah, I didn’t want to make a scene by worrying him,

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but I ended up making one anyways.

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I really wish that having an accent or being from a different country wasn’t a big deal.”

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“Even people here think that if you have a thick regional accent or

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if you have trouble with Hochdeutsch

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then you’re uneducated,” Volker said, shaking his head.

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“I guess I sometimes feel as if I’m in a country that doesn’t really want me to be here.

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I know that immigration is a big deal in many countries.

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It seems like even in Italy there are people who aren’t fond of immigrants.”

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“Really?” Volker asked, surprised at the notion.

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“I guess people who emigrate from Africa or the Middle East into Italy

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also have to deal with discrimination,” Lorenzo said glumly.

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“It’s terrible. I mean, I know there are still some people that dislike immigrants but not all people are xenophobic.”

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“I know that, but sometimes I really wish that I weren’t so different.”

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“Like I said, we’re all different,”

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Volker said with reassurance.

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“Yeah but I wish I didn’t have to feel this way.

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It’s not enough that I’m gay, but I’m also an immigrant.”

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“You don’t have to keep thinking about this all the time.

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I try to just let it go and forget about it,”

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Volker said. “Maybe you’re just tougher than me.”

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“It doesn’t mean that it still doesn’t hurt when people say homophobic things.”

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The badger frowned.

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“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that,”

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Lorenzo said quickly

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and looked back at the ground.

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“It’s okay. I know that people are afraid of me.

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I know that they think I’m gonna beat them up.

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I still remember the day I met you.

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We were sitting next to each other in math class

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and I knew you were a little scared of me being this big, angry guy.

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But when I was having trouble with some of the math problems,

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you helped me with everything, and you were so patient with me.”

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Volker kissed Lorenzo on his forehead.

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“I was afraid of coming out to you.

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I was scared that you wouldn’t want to be my friend anymore.

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Plus I had a crush on you after you saved me from those xenophobes.”

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“I was afraid too.

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I knew a lot of people already didn’t like me but when you came out to me

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you gave me the courage to do it too.”

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Lorenzo blushed. “Aw, Volker.”

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“We’re out of the closet.

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We shouldn’t care about people’s stupid opinions.

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We have friends with families that moved here from other countries too,

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like Turkey, Greece, and Poland.

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You’re not alone, Lorenzo.

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You’ve got friends

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and me. You also have your dad.”

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Lorenzo smiled at the thought

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and Volker gave him a tight hug.

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“I love you, Volker.”

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“I love you too, Lorenzo.”

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The two of them cuddled and watched television

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until Lorenzo’s father returned home a few hours later.

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“I see you two have been having fun,” Massimo chided with a small grin on his face.

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“I was just about to leave.

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Oh yeah, I still have your viola at my house,” the badger said quickly.

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“I’ll bring it back to you tomorrow.”

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“Okay, thanks,” Lorenzo said with his paws in his lap

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and his head down.

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“See you, Lorenzo,” Volker said,

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blowing his boyfriend a kiss.

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Lorenzo caught it and gave a little wave.

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“Goodbye, Herr Agresta,” Volker said to Lorenzo’s dad.

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“Bye, Volker,” Massimo said kindly in his low voice.

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The badger took his shopping bags and left the apartment.

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Lorenzo’s father put his belongings away in his room

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and walked back out.

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The large otter plopped beside his son on the couch

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and asked, “Can we speak in Italian now?”

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“Of course we can,”

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the smaller otter said,

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his head still bowed and the feelings of guilt resurfacing.

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“What was all of that about earlier today, Lorenzo?”

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Massimo said as Lorenzo felt a large paw rest gently on his shoulder.

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“I’m sorry, Dad. I feel really awful about that,”

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he whimpered. He put his glasses on the side table,

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placed his head on his father’s chest,

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and hugged him. His father rubbed his back

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and patted him on the head.

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“I’m really sorry for yelling at you,” Lorenzo said.

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He sat up and wiped the forming tears from his eyes.

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“Some stuff happened today and some other stuff happened last week.”

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“What happened?” Massimo asked him calmly.

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He hugged the little otter tighter.

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“You can tell me anything that’s been going on.”

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Lorenzo recounted the incident with the Italian tourist at the deli.

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Massimo nodded and listened quietly with understanding eyes.

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“And what happened today?”

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Massimo asked gently.

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“Some guys were harassing Volker and me

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because we were kissing.” “Did they hurt you?”

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Massimo’s voice filled with concern.

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“No, they didn’t hurt us and there were some adults there who told them to leave us alone.”

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“So you’ve been sad because someone told you those things

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and because some boys were making fun of you?”

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“It hurts, dad.” Lorenzo sobbed.

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His large tail slumped against the couch.

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“I know it hurts. People are terrible to me too.”

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“I just don’t want to tell you things because I don’t want to worry you.”

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“I’d rather have you tell me what’s wrong

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than you shouting at me.”

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“Dad, you have enough to take care of and I don’t want to be a burden.”

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“Lorenzo, if you have an issue

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then I want you to come to me and tell me.

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I want you to know that I’m someone you can trust.

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I’m your father. I know you’re grown

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up and you want to keep things to yourself, but I want to help you.” The shorter otter

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took a breath. “Alright.” “I remember that you didn’t even tell me that your uncle Armando used to hit you until we moved out.

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I was so angry at him.

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I called him and yelled at him.

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I don’t think we’ll ever be able to go back to Venice after that.

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He was so rude and angry.

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He tried so hard not to seem like a ‘southern Italian’ yet he was so pompous

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and acted like he was so much better than me.”

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Lorenzo looked at the ground at the mention of his uncle.

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“I was afraid that he’d hurt me more if I told you.”

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Massimo hugged his son tightly.

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“He’s horrid. I would never hit you,

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and I don’t understand why he would ever do that to you.

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I don’t think any parent should hit their child.

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Children don’t deserve that.”

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“I hated being in Venice.

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I hated how the other children would make fun of me because of our accent

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and the fact that we were from the south.

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I would always do better than them at tests,

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and they would still always call me stupid.

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When we lived near Bari,

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I didn’t have to worry about other people making fun of me.”

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“I knew you were angry with me for leaving

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Pietre dei Marini and then again for leaving Italy,

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but I knew that this would be good for us.

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Things are better now,”

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Massimo said with relief in his voice.

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“We don’t have to live with my idiotic brother,

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and I don’t have to depend on him.

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I have my own money

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and I’m happy. When we were in Venice

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I couldn’t find a job that would pay me well enough to give us a chance to live alone.”

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“I guess some things are better.

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I’d rather be living here than with Uncle Armando.”

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“You know, when your mother divorced me I was so afraid,

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and I didn’t know what to do.

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Grandpa and grandma had passed away a year before so I couldn’t turn to them.

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You always made me so happy,

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and I felt like I had to do everything in my power to protect you.

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When I lost my job

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and I couldn’t afford our home and we had to move in with that idiot,

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I felt like a failure.

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When I lost my job again in Venice,

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it felt even worse.”

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“I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

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Lorenzo knew the story already

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but wanted to console his father.

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“But you were there with me.

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You’ve always been with me.

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I know that we don’t have much

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but what we do have is ours, I’m happy living in Germany with my son.

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I love you so much, Lorenzo.”

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“I love you too, Dad.”

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The little otter looked up at his father

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with so much pride

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and gratitude in his heart. #

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The evening of the spring festival turned the small,

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quiet town of Hügeldorf into a sparkling party.

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The buildings and trees were covered in lights,

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and lanterns hung across lampposts.

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Food vendors lined the main streets,

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and people cheered and talked to one another.

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Neighbors reacquainted themselves,

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and children ran around with food and sweets.

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There was a makeshift stage in the middle of the town square

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where the Gymnasium orchestra played.

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The orchestra was made of diverse students of different species and class grades

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sitting in their different instrument’s sections

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performing together to create beautiful music in unison.

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Herr Farber pierced the air with his baton at the last note of the piece.

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His face, which was starting to change to its summer coat, looked

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overjoyed at the performance of the students.

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There was a huge cheer from the audience,

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and they all applauded with ferocious enthusiasm.

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Both Lorenzo and Volker

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looked across to one another in the front row

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and smiled. In the crowd Lorenzo’s father and Volker’s family sat next to each other.

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Volker’s mother recorded the performance with a camcorder.

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Volker’s brother and father weren’t paying attention,

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instead they were on their tablets, distracted by television and the news.

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Herr Farber gestured for the students to stand

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and they bowed to the audience.

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Everyone could tell that arctic fox was proud of the young musicians.

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The audience demanded an encore but the next musical act was up.

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Volker and Lorenzo left the stage with their instruments in tow

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as a smaller jazz band started to set up.

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It looked like it consisted of older members of the community.

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Herr Farber remained on the stage

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as he was also their conductor.

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The two gave a small wave at the arctic fox from off of the stage

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and he waved back.

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“Volker, do you think we can go by the fountain?”

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Lorenzo asked. “My feet are kind of hot.”

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“Of course we can.

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Let’s give our stuff to our parents first so we don’t have to carry it around,”

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Volker suggested.

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They received hugs from Volker’s mom

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and Lorenzo’s dad

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and left their belongings with them.

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The two walked down a small road

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illuminated by glowing streetlamps

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and stringed lights.

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They held each other’s paws after they scouted the area to make sure no one else was around.

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A little while later

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they reached a small rectangular fountain that wasn’t running.

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Lorenzo hurriedly took off his dress shoes and socks.

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He pulled the legs of his tuxedo pants up

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and dipped his feet in the cold water with a relieved sigh.

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Volker just sat on the edge of the fountain facing away from the water.

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“I do miss being near the sea,” Lorenzo

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said as he splashed around a little bit.

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The jazz band played a fast-paced swing piece in the background

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and Volker swayed to the music.

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“When I lived near Bari we were on the coast.

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I would go swimming with my dad and my friends all the time.”

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Lorenzo looked at the dark shops around them.

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One of the stores sold art supplies

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and had a painting of the Alps in the front window.

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To his left was a floral shop that had a sale on small potted trees.

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He sighed and said,

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“The hills and the forest are beautiful here,

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but I still wish it wasn’t landlocked.”

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“Yeah, the ocean is beautiful,

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but at least there are rivers.

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I thought you liked hiking through the Black Forest with me.”

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“I do, but I still like swimming a lot more.

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There’s just something about being surrounded by water that puts me at ease.”

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“I guess I really like beach vacations in the north

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and the ones in France.

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I’m not a fan of the rocky beaches in Marseilles though.

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Hopefully one day I can go to Italy with you and see the beaches there,”

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Volker said and smiled at the otter.

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“I don’t plan on going back anytime soon though,”

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Lorenzo said gently kicking the water with a sigh.

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He thought about his time at the restaurant with Volker and his father.

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The awareness of how disconnected he was with Italian culture pained him

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while still feeling as if it was his own fault.

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“Maybe we could travel together somewhere one day,”

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Volker said. “You seem happier this week…

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or at least less angry at people.”

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“Oh, thanks,” the badger said sarcastically.

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“I didn’t mean any offense by it,”

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the otter said. “I know, I’m just joking with you.

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We played well for today.”

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“We played well?” Lorenzo said incredulously.

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“It was amazing!” “It could have been better,”

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Volker replied. Lorenzo rolled his eyes.

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“Of course you’d say that.”

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After a pause Volker piped up

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and said, “There’s another thing.

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I talked to my parents about studying music

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and I took your advice.”

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“What did they say?”

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Lorenzo tilted his head.

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“They still don’t like the idea of me studying music at a university,

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but they were more okay with it when I suggested I could also study business or instrument repair after I graduate

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as a fallback plan,”

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the badger said and looked up at the stars.

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“At least now they’re okay with me going into a music performance program.”

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“I know you don’t want to teach

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so those sound like good ideas,”

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Lorenzo said earnestly.

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“Maybe after I get my degree

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I’ll just do auditions or even go for a master’s.”

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Volker smirked. “If things don’t work out

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I’ll be there for you, and if things get really bad we can live with my dad,”

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Lorenzo said and laced his fingers with Volker’s.

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“That’s good to know.

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We’ve got another year of Gymnasium and then the Abitur test.

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After that we’ll be somewhere.”

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Volker gently squeezed Lorenzo’s paw.

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“I’ll go wherever you go.

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A lot of universities have math programs.”

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“Really? You don’t want to study in Italy?”

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“Well, I’ve never written a real essay in Italian.

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They’ve all been in German, besides the ones I’ve written for English and French class.

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Plus, I know mathematical terms better in German too.

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I’m so angry at myself for forgetting so much Italian.”

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“Don’t you talk to your dad in Italian?”

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“I do, but that’s not the same as academic language,

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and I want to be with you.

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I guess the vocabulary we use when we’re twelve isn’t the same as when we go to a university.

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It’s so frustrating.

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I have to go to a university in a country where people will be rude to me,

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work there, and live there for the rest of my life.

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I call myself Italian because I was born there, but now my world consists of German culture.

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I have no idea what’s even going on in Italy these days;

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I have no real connections there.

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I don’t even know what I’m supposed to be,”

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Lorenzo said, massaging his temples.

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“To me, you’re the sweetest otter in the whole world,

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and I think you belong here,”

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Volker said and placed their interwoven paws to his chest.

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The two took a few minutes to enjoy the calm air

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as one boy stargazed

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and the other watched the water ripples around his feet.

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A new piece started up from the town square.

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The beat was slower

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and the bassline was heavier.

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A cry of a single trumpet soared through the air

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and soon the rest of the brass instruments followed.

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The warm legato notes and wavy slurs created a romantic,

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cozy mood in the air.

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“Would you care to dance?”

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Volker asked Lorenzo as he put his black paw out.

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“Just don’t step on my feet okay?” the otter smirked as their paws reunited. “I’m not that clumsy,”

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the badger replied

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as he helped Lorenzo up.

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Lorenzo sank into his boyfriend’s chest

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as the two of them danced slowly rocking against one another.

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The otter’s soaked feet

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made wet paw prints that shone against the light of the streetlamps.

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They let the warm jazz overcome their senses

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and surround them.

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Swaying under the glow of the moon

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and the glimmer of the stars,

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they felt themselves harmonize with the world around them.

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This was the the third of three parts

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of “Tempus Imperfectum”

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by Al Song, read for you by Khaki,

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your faithful fireside companion. Tune in next time to find out how

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As always, you can find more stories on the web at thevoice.dog,

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or find the show wherever you get your podcasts.