full
“And the Chunnering Wyrm doth Chide” by Rob MacWolf (read by the author)
It seems like a simple question: where’d you get that feather? What’s the worst that could happen if you asked? Why… he could tell you.
Today’s story is “And the Chunnering Wyrm Doth Chide” written and read for you by Rob MacWolf, whose fault all of this is, and you can find more of his stories on his SoFurry page.
A scenario. You meet an old friend, you say hello, you sit down to talk. You notice a new and unusual detail, some small trinket perhaps, like a feather. Should you ask about it? Surely the worst that can happen is that they would tell you… tonight, in “And the Chunnering Wyrm Doth Chide” on the Ghost of Dog.
thevoice.dog | Apple podcasts | Spotify | Google Podcasts
If you have a story you think would be a good fit, you can check out the requirements, fill out the submission template and get in touch with Khaki on Twitter or Telegram!
Transcript
You’re listening to The Voice of Dog.
Speaker:and this week we’re reading Halloween stories
Speaker:Today’s story is
Speaker:“And the Chunnering Wyrm Doth Chide”
Speaker:written and read for you by Rob MacWolf,
Speaker:whose fault all of this is,
Speaker:and you can find more of his stories on his SoFurry page.
Speaker:page.. A scenario. You meet an old friend, you say hello,
Speaker:you sit down to talk.
Speaker:You notice a new and unusual detail, some small trinket perhaps,
Speaker:like a feather. Should you ask about it?
Speaker:Surely the worst that can happen is that they would tell you…
Speaker:tonight, in “And the Chunnering Wyrm Doth Chide”
Speaker:on the Ghost of Dog. Please enjoy: “And the Chunnering Wyrm Doth Chide” by Rob MacWolf, read by the author himself
Speaker:Well, it’s a complicated story.
Speaker:This was a few years back, by now.
Speaker:I was trying to get up toward St. Arringer’s, I’d had a message from a cousin there was work to be had.
Speaker:So I was catching long distance busses when I could afford em and hitchhiking when I couldn’t.
Speaker:I got dropped off just after sundown by a trucker.
Speaker:Horned lizard, handsome guy,
Speaker:woulda offered to share a motel room if his route hadn’t been about to turn the wrong direction.
Speaker:Not fifteen minutes later a thunderstorm blows up, out of nowhere.
Speaker:A real gullywasher.
Speaker:So I sprinted for the only shelter I could see, which turned out to be a bus stop.
Speaker:Now, I dunno if you’ve ever caught a bus out in the prairie states?
Speaker:But the bus stops are in these shacks, on account of the blizzards they get some winters.
Speaker:If the road gets snowed in and the bus is late, then people waiting for it need shelter or they’ll freeze, right?
Speaker:They got lights that run off a solar panel on the roof,
Speaker:never seem to last more’n a couple hours past midnight,
Speaker:and they got little charcoal stoves, though usually somebody’s swiped the charcoal.
Speaker:Even if that’s not what the place was meant for,
Speaker:they’re a good place to duck in a downpour.
Speaker:I get in, and there’s other folks in there, which,
not unusual:Older lady, bison,
not unusual:overalls and big waterproof boots.
not unusual:Guy in a bus line uniform, bobcat, probably a relief driver if I had to guess.
not unusual:They’re stooped over the stove,
not unusual:trying to get it goin.
not unusual:Then over in the corner is an old skunk, scrawny, maybe got some otter or ferret in him.
not unusual:Was sleeping in here, by the looks of him,
not unusual:and got woke up when folks ducked in from the storm.
not unusual:At first I think he’s drunk,
not unusual:and then I think he’s sick,
not unusual:and then I think he’s both so I decide to stand on the other side of the stove.
not unusual:No offense, a course, god knows the world aint gentle with none of us,
not unusual:it’s just I’d been riding the busses and the rails long enough to know how to keep my mouth shut and not make eye contact.
not unusual:Didn’t work this time. “So!”
not unusual:the skunk gets to his feet, unsteady like,
not unusual:“You wanna know how I got this feather?!”
not unusual:All three of us freeze. And it’s
not unusual:one of those moments, like,
not unusual:where I don’t have to even look at the bison or the bobcat
not unusual:to know we’re all three thinking the same thing:
not unusual:if one of us says ‘no, nobody asked’
not unusual:is that gonna rile him up?
not unusual:While we’re stuck in here with him?
not unusual:He comes closer, into firelight,
not unusual:and he holds out a crow feather.
not unusual:What? No, it’s not this one. It’s a different one.
not unusual:I’m getting to it, like I said,
not unusual:it’s complicated.
not unusual:So he stares at the feather he’s holding—which is NOT this one I’ve got, I shoulda specified
not unusual:—and he says “Johnny Boy could’n play the fiddle worth a damn.”
not unusual:Like we’re supposed to know who that is.
not unusual:“Didn’t stop him tryin,
not unusual:much as we all dearly wished he would,”
not unusual:and the old skunk steps over the bench and sits hunched over the fire,
not unusual:which was when I guessed it was too late to stop him.
not unusual:“Every night, he’d show up at the juke house with the beat up ol’ fiddle his uncle useta play.
not unusual:Didn’t have no case, his Pa’d pawned that, years ago, afore he skipped town.
not unusual:Johnny Boy jes carried it round by the neck.
not unusual:neck.” “Uh, sir,” the bobcat says, the kinda voice where you could tell he’s used to having to tell people things they don’t wanna hear for a job, “I don’t think I know the fellow in question.”
not unusual:“Oh, don’t worry none, you don’t got to.
not unusual:The feather’s the important part, anyway!” The skunk either can’t tell we didn’t want to hear the story
not unusual:or is pretending
not unusual:cause he doesn’t care.
not unusual:“So Johnny Boy’d turn up at the Juke House. And every night when a fella least expected it, when yer jes tryin’ to knock back a whiskey’r two to make yer back stop achin’ from work
not unusual:afore you get on your way home,
not unusual:suddenly there’s an almighty horrible screechin’ noise,
not unusual:and by the time you caught yer balance and stopped choking on the whiskey you swallered wrong,
not unusual:he’s announcing that screechin’ was s’posed to be My Old Kentucky Home,
not unusual:and did anybody have any requests?”
not unusual:If I’d been quicker on the uptake, I would’ve said something right then about, yeah,
not unusual:sure is a bad deal when someone barges in and starts up a whole-ass performance at a group of strangers
not unusual:who don’t want it
not unusual:and didn’t ask for it!
not unusual:“How long he got put up with would
not unusual:differ from night to night, but t’weren’t never long.
not unusual:Sooner’r later he’d get laughed out or shouted out or kicked
not unusual:out, he’d swear up’n down that one day he’d prove us all wrong, he’d be the best damn fiddle player anyone’d ever heard,
not unusual:then he’d scurry off home with his tail twixt his legs and his fiddle in his paw.
not unusual:But he was always back the next night.”
not unusual:The old skunk stares into the burnin stove through the bedraggled fringe of the feather he’s still got a death grip on.
not unusual:“Till he wasn’t.” “One mornin’, he din’t turn up to work.
not unusual:Fellas go to check his shack, all his clothes an things is still there, even the ol’ fiddle, but he ain’t. Some thought he was sleepin off a mean hangover in a ditch somewhere, some thought he’d hopped a train and skipped town like his Pa afore him,
not unusual:some said he’d been seen out on the old cart road, where it crossed them tracks that led up’ta the closed down mines.
not unusual:Said he was hollerin and weepin and carryin on past midnight.
not unusual:Guess there were some jokes about how that din’t sound no different than his usual routine at the juke house.”
not unusual:Thunder sounds, close enough that it rattles the windows and roof.
not unusual:The old skunk looks around,
not unusual:hunches his shoulders,
not unusual:like he’s surprised to see us there.
not unusual:“You alright there hun?”
not unusual:the bison says. Like she’s quieting a child.
not unusual:She got a softer voice than I woulda guessed.
not unusual:“Why…” The skunk blinks himself back into the present.
not unusual:“I’ll be jes fine, ma’am, just gotta finish my story,” he says, exactly like he was about
not unusual:to finish that sentence with ‘before it’s too late.’
not unusual:“We meant to kept an eye out fer him,
not unusual:fer a couple weeks.
not unusual:But you know how ‘tis.
not unusual:You’re thinkin bout’ clearin’ brush, bout sweepin’ locusts outa the tomata patch,
not unusual:bout what you’re gon’ do if the well goes dry afore you can git the windmill fixed,
not unusual:and next thing you know it’s been forty days’n forty nights and everybody’s forgot Johnny Boy like he’s Prohibition.”
not unusual:“Till the night he walks inta the Juke House again.”
not unusual:The Skunk’s growling now, more’n he is speaking.
not unusual:“Would’n blame ya none fer not knowin’ him to look at.
not unusual:Few fellas there that night didn’t recognize him at first.
not unusual:He looked different.
not unusual:Taller, harder, more sure o’ hisself.
not unusual:He’s wearing a dirty, raggedy black poncho that looked like he stole it outa a stable, and a beat up hat with a crow’s feather stuck in the brim.
not unusual:And when he gets a couple steps inside he
not unusual:throws the poncho back over his shoulders, and I seen he
not unusual:aint got no shirt, just some odd-lookin’ trousers and boots, old-fashioned,
not unusual:like from yer grampa’s closet.
not unusual:But I also seen, under the poncho
not unusual:he’s carryin’ the fanciest-lookin fiddle I ever laid eyes on.”
not unusual:He pauses, waits for a rumble of thunder to stop rattling the windows and squeezing the roof.
not unusual:“I’m no wire-polisher, miself.
not unusual:I wouldn’ know a decent fiddle from a clattery ol’ devil-box less I got to hear ‘em,
not unusual:and even then you could probly fool me if’n yer good enough
not unusual:or bad enough at playin’ the business.
not unusual:But even I can tell this thing’s somethin special.
not unusual:The body is black, as midnight in a coal mine,
not unusual:but it shimmers all green and purple and gold when it moves past the light.
not unusual:The bow looks sharp at the end, like a bayonet on a ol’ rifle,
not unusual:and strings is already quiverin fore it even gets set to em, like live high tension wires.
not unusual:And the pins at the top is tufted,
not unusual:like bedraggled feathers.”
not unusual:“Johnny Boy don’t say nothin.
not unusual:Don’t greet nobody, don’t tell nobody where he been.
not unusual:Just swaggers to the center of the floor and sets bow to strings, like he always useta.”
not unusual:He’s huddled in on himself, now,
not unusual:the feather clutched in both hands under his chin,
not unusual:one thumb running up and down the spine, compulsive like.
not unusual:“I couldn’ tell ya what it was he played.
not unusual:Couldn’ hum nor whistle a note of it. But I won’t never be able to get it outa my head neither. It was like having that cold blast of wind come down over you, outa the northwest, right
not unusual:before the rain hits. Was like walkin’ past a field a dry corn, after harvest,
not unusual:and hearing all the dead stalks rustle one gainst t’nother though
not unusual:there aint no wind.
not unusual:Was like fallin’ inta a tangle of blackberries in bloom,
not unusual:brambles swallow you up,
not unusual:thorns scrape you raw,
not unusual:but the smell of the blossoms is so strong you barely notice.
not unusual:It was like lookin’ out from a window,
not unusual:when the shutters is bangin in the wind, and seeing a
not unusual:different land outside
not unusual:from the one that oughta be there.
not unusual:It was like being lost out in the dark
not unusual:and havin’ nothing but ol’ tunes from when you was a young un
not unusual:to ward off whatever might be out in the night
not unusual:watchin’ you. It was so goddamn beautiful,
not unusual:but I aint never been so sore fraid in all my life.”
not unusual:“The only thing is, the longer I listened,”
not unusual:he sits up, a little, seems to notice us again, “the
not unusual:less I was sure it were a fiddle I was listening to.
not unusual:Started to sound like a whole mess of crows, like if
not unusual:crows had a gospel choir, all singin’ together.
not unusual:Or like somebody’d…
not unusual:made a fiddle outa crow voices,
not unusual:stead of outa wood or
not unusual:strings.” “I,” says the bobcat,
not unusual:“don’t think I know what you mean by that, sir.”
not unusual:“Don’t think I rightly
not unusual:know miself what I mean by that,”
not unusual:the skunk shrugs, “Like I said,
not unusual:I couldn’t tell what t’was.
not unusual:You’d have to hear it fer your own self. Not that I’d wish that on you.”
not unusual:“But you said it was beautiful?”
not unusual:the bison’s brows furrow.
not unusual:“So beautiful. And I pray I don’t never hear it again,
not unusual:not that it does no good”
not unusual:He glares at the doorway,
not unusual:though there’s nothing outside but the storm.
not unusual:“So, Johnny Boy finished playin’.
not unusual:And it was dead silent, not a one of dared even t’breathe.
not unusual:And he bowed slow, and he grinned mean,
not unusual:like he’d sure showed us.
not unusual:Which he had, alright, I’ll give him that.
not unusual:So he turns toward the bar,
not unusual:to get hisself a drink I s’pose.
not unusual:I remember thinkin’ that
not unusual:he still aint said a word to nobody, so I’m fixin to ask where he got that fiddle.
not unusual:When there was a sudden almighty wind,
not unusual:and all the lights went out.”
not unusual:Suddenly a gust of wind hits so hard it rocks the whole shed.
not unusual:The lights flicker and the fire in the stove roars,
not unusual:and for a second all the fear I got
not unusual:gets real specific:
not unusual:but no tornado rips the walls down,
not unusual:no funnel cloud knocks the roof off,
not unusual:and we all relax… except
not unusual:the skunk.
not unusual:His back is ramrod straight, his face is looking out the window at the black thunderlit night,
not unusual:and his eyes aint focused on anything I can see.
not unusual:He continues like he’s trying to hurry.
not unusual:“I saw a square of less-dark darkness,
not unusual:and I realize the doors musta blown open.
not unusual:And there’s a man standin’ there.
not unusual:A tall man. Too tall. Either
not unusual:that, or his feet don’t touch the ground none.”
not unusual:“Folk don’t agree as what happened next. I heard em claim it was a wolf or a lion or a dragon,
not unusual:but I don’t believe none of em could see enough to even guess as to species.
not unusual:Twas too dark to see most anythin’.
not unusual:All they coulda see’d, all I could see, was the too-tall man
not unusual:blowin in. He glided over to Johnny boy, cowerin’ by the bar,
not unusual:he caught him up inta the air.”
not unusual:“And he kissed him.”
not unusual:“Next thing I know, the darkness is a great flock of crows,
not unusual:scatterin’ every which way, cawin’ and flappin’ and screamin’ all to hell.
not unusual:Everyone in the juke house’s hollerin’ and runnin’,
not unusual:divin’ under the tables and coverin’ their heads.”
not unusual:The rain’s passed on now, there’s
not unusual:just a gentle wind
not unusual:humming under the corrugated steel eaves. “By the time the lights came back on, the crows’re gone.
not unusual:So’s the tall man. So’s Johnny
not unusual:Boy.” “Din’t nobody never see him again.”
not unusual:The skunk crumples back, a little,
not unusual:and he don’t look drunk anymore, he just looks old and tired.
not unusual:And relieved. Like when you’ve been walking all day, and your back is sore, and your feet hurt, and you finally get home and sit down.
not unusual:“All I got to prove it happened
not unusual:is this feather.” I think he’s about to say more,
not unusual:but the lights go out.
not unusual:It’s pitch black, but I hear the door creak open.
not unusual:I feel a breeze come in.
not unusual:I think I hear the skunk’s voice say something,
not unusual:sounds like it could be ‘find me?’
not unusual:could be ‘finally?’
not unusual:And then the darkness aint darkness, it’s a
not unusual:writhing riot of crows,
not unusual:bursting out everywhere, screaming in my face,
not unusual:trying to pour out the bus station door fast as they can.
not unusual:The lights don’t came back on. Toldya about the solar panel.
not unusual:But the stove does, a little. That’s
not unusual:just enough light to see the skunk’s gone.
not unusual:Only trace left is a feather.
not unusual:Not like the one he was holding,
not unusual:this one’s glossy and new and every little fiber’s neatly in place.
not unusual:I shouldn’t have picked it up.
not unusual:I shouldn’t have touched it. It just…
not unusual:didn’t occur to me
not unusual:that not taking it
not unusual:was an option, I dunno.
not unusual:We wait for the bus outside.
not unusual:Only remains of the storm are distant lightning, off east,
not unusual:and if either of the other two see the silhouette of a tall man,
not unusual:outlined against the lightning,
not unusual:tall enough that maybe his feet weren’t touching the ground, well,
not unusual:they don’t say anything.
not unusual:They board fast as they can, when the bus comes. I don’t have money for a fare, but the bobcat says something to the driver and
not unusual:I get given a break.
not unusual:But they both sit as far from me as they can,
not unusual:and I don’t blame them.
not unusual:So yeah. That’s how I got this feather.
not unusual:I’ve carried it ever since,
not unusual:but I don’t know any more about it than that.
not unusual:Except maybe... if the lights go out, any second now?
not unusual:If you hear the door slam open?
not unusual:If there’s a wild cold breeze?
not unusual:If the darkness is suddenly full of crows,
not unusual:and if I’m gone? You leave any feathers you see
not unusual:right where they
not unusual:lie. This was “And the Chunnering Wyrm Doth Chide”
not unusual:by Rob MacWolf,
not unusual:read for you by the author himself
not unusual:as part of a special Halloween presentation
not unusual:called The Ghost Of Dog.
not unusual:As always, you can find more stories on the web
not unusual:at thevoice.dog,
not unusual:or find the show wherever you get your podcasts.
not unusual:Thank you for listening
not unusual:to The Voice of Dog.
