full

“A Fox Walks Into A Bar” by Spottystuff (read by Solomon Harries, part 2 of 2)

Kieran is on the hunt again, but he’s met with difficulties. He’s found a lead, but now must see if it can lead him anywhere.

Today’s story is the second and final part of “A Fox Walks Into A Bar” by Spottystuff, who every year qualifies to continue calling himself an author as well, by a vanishingly slim margin. You can find more of their work on SoFurry, Furaffinity or BlueSky.

Last time, Kieran encountered a deer named Vincente in the local inn, and negotiated an agreement with him after some customary persuasion. Vincente agreed, but what awaits them in that keep, none of them can say.

Read by Solomon Harries, Cuddly Badger Dad.

thevoice.dog | Apple podcasts | Spotify | Google Podcasts

If you have a story you think would be a good fit, you can check out the requirements, fill out the submission template and get in touch with us.

https://thevoice.dog/episode/a-fox-walks-into-a-bar-by-spottystuff-part-2-of-2

Transcript
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You’re

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listening

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to

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The

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Voice

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of

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Dog.

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This

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is

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Rob

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MacWolf,

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your

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fellow

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traveler,

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and

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Today’s

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story

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is

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the

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second

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and

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final

Speaker:

part

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of “A

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Fox Walks Into A Bar” by Spottystuff, who

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every

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year

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qualifies

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to

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continue

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calling

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himself

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an

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author

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as

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well,

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by a

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vanishingly

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slim

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margin.

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You

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can

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find

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more

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of their work on SoFurry, Furaffinity

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or BlueSky.


Last time,

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Kieran encountered a

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deer

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named

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Vincente

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in

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the

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local

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inn,

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and

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negotiated

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an

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agreement

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with

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him

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after

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some

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customary

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persuasion.

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Vincente

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agreed,

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but

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what

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awaits

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them

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in

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that

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keep,

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none

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of

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them

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can

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say.

Read

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by

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Solomon

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Harries,

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Cuddly

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Badger

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Dad.

Please

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enjoy


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Fox

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Walks

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Into

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A

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Bar”

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by

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Spottystuff, Part 2

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of 2

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eye

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my

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on

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from

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Vinny here.

Speaker:

A

Speaker:

rotten

Speaker:

business

Speaker:

indeed.

Speaker:

Had

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

known,

Speaker:

I’d

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

sent

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

letter

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

majesty

Speaker:

at once,

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

woulda’.”

“I

Speaker:

believe

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

would

Speaker:

have,”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

tell

Speaker:

him. “You

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

men

Speaker:

strike

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

good

Speaker:

fellows.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

believe

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

soldier

Speaker:

should

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

held

Speaker:

responsible

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

commanders'

Speaker:

crimes,

Speaker:

after

Speaker:

all.

Speaker:

Unless

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

takes

Speaker:

part,

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

course.”

I

Speaker:

give

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

guardsman

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

meaningful

Speaker:

look.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

don’t

Speaker:

harbour

Speaker:

any

Speaker:

illusions

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

I’m

Speaker:

intimidating

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

man,

Speaker:

who

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

thrice

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

size

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

then

Speaker:

some,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

expected

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

me.

“We

Speaker:

watch

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

walls,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

patrol

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

town.

Speaker:

We

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

no

Speaker:

inclination

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

investigate

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

Lordships

Speaker:

own

Speaker:

private

Speaker:

dealings,

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

know.

Speaker:

We

Speaker:

only

Speaker:

do

Speaker:

what

Speaker:

we’re

Speaker:

put

Speaker:

here

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

do

Speaker:

by

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

grace

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

Majesty.

Speaker:

On

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

heart

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

swear

Speaker:

this.”

“Of

Speaker:

course,

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

course,”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

tell

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

big

Speaker:

dog,

Speaker:

paws

Speaker:

held

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

placatingly. “Might

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

so

Speaker:

good

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

admit

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

house?

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

matters

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

discuss

Speaker:

with the Don.” I smile at Vincente then. “And

Speaker:

I’d

Speaker:

like

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

bring

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

one

Speaker:

along,

Speaker:

too.”

“Would

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

like

Speaker:

us

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

come

Speaker:

along,

Speaker:

too?”

Speaker:

one

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

guardsmen

Speaker:

asks. “To

Speaker:

arrest

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

son

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

bitch,

Speaker:

begging

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

lord’s

Speaker:

forgiveness.”

It’s

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

half

Speaker:

dressed

Speaker:

guard,

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

hound

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

long,

Speaker:

floppy

Speaker:

ears

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

young

Speaker:

eyes.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

smile at him

Speaker:

amiably.

“I

Speaker:

appreciate

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

offer,

Speaker:

guardsman.

Speaker:

But

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

don’t

Speaker:

intend

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

making

Speaker:

any

Speaker:

arrests.”

The

Speaker:

Mastiff,

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

cross

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

courtyard

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

silence.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

can

Speaker:

see

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

some

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

windows,

Speaker:

servants

Speaker:

keeping

Speaker:

an

Speaker:

eye

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

us

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

we

Speaker:

approach.

Speaker:

As

Speaker:

soon

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

touch

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

door,

Speaker:

they

Speaker:

vanish

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

windows.

Speaker:

As

Speaker:

we

Speaker:

admit

Speaker:

ourselves,

Speaker:

they’re

Speaker:

all

Speaker:

rushing

Speaker:

about,

Speaker:

arms

Speaker:

stuffed

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

silverware,

Speaker:

bottles,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

other

Speaker:

trinkets of

Speaker:

worth.

“By

Speaker:

God,”

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

Mastiff

Speaker:

mutters. “Have

Speaker:

they

Speaker:

gone

Speaker:

mad?”

He

Speaker:

reaches

Speaker:

out

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

try

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

stop

Speaker:

one

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

servants,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

lay

Speaker:

a paw on

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

elbow.

“Never

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

mind,

Speaker:

sir,”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

tell

Speaker:

him. “I

Speaker:

would

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

bother

Speaker:

them,

Speaker:

if

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

were

Speaker:

you.

Speaker:

They’ll

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

making

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

food

Speaker:

come

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

morning,

Speaker:

rest

Speaker:

assured.

Speaker:

His

Speaker:

lordship

Speaker:

may

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

few

Speaker:

forks

Speaker:

shorter

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

silverware

Speaker:

drawers,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

believe

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

has

Speaker:

far

Speaker:

more

Speaker:

pressing

Speaker:

issues

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

worry

Speaker:

about,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

next

Speaker:

household

Speaker:

won’t

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

lacking

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

silverware,

Speaker:

either.

Speaker:

Rather

Speaker:

that,

Speaker:

than

Speaker:

any

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

ill

Speaker:

gained

Speaker:

wealth

Speaker:

pass

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

estate.

Speaker:

A

Speaker:

commander

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

an

Speaker:

island

Speaker:

such

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

could

Speaker:

stand

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

share

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

gains

Speaker:

around,

Speaker:

don’t

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

think?”

The

Speaker:

mastiff’s

Speaker:

brow

Speaker:

furrows,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

old

Speaker:

dog

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

far

Speaker:

too

Speaker:

rigid

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

allow

Speaker:

curiosity

Speaker:

or

Speaker:

defiance

Speaker:

to mar his

Speaker:

stature.

Speaker:

And

Speaker:

rarely

Speaker:

do

Speaker:

these

Speaker:

men

Speaker:

like

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

bow

Speaker:

down

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

fox,

Speaker:

intellectually.

Speaker:

He

Speaker:

straightens

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

back,

Speaker:

pretends

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

understand,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

notice

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

kitchen

Speaker:

maid

Speaker:

removing

Speaker:

silver

Speaker:

trinkets

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

glass

Speaker:

cabinet

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

stuffing

Speaker:

them

Speaker:

down

Speaker:

her

Speaker:

stays,

Speaker:

right

Speaker:

under

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

nose.

We

Speaker:

climb

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

top

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

tower.

Speaker:

By

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

time,

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

mastiff

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

breathing

Speaker:

heavily,

Speaker:

resting

Speaker:

an

Speaker:

elbow

Speaker:

on a nearby windowsill.

“Go on through, fox,

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

apartments are

Speaker:

just

Speaker:

beyond

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

door.”

Speaker:

The mastiff

Speaker:

indicates

Speaker:

a narrow

Speaker:

door. “I want no

Speaker:

part

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

sorry

Speaker:

business.”

I

Speaker:

notice

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

shadow

Speaker:

moving

Speaker:

under

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

doorsill,

Speaker:

so

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

draw

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

sword,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

motion

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

keep

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

behind

Speaker:

me.

“Careful,”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

whisper. “Men

Speaker:

are

Speaker:

no

Speaker:

different

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

cornered

Speaker:

animals.

Speaker:

In

Speaker:

fear,

Speaker:

they

Speaker:

will

Speaker:

say

Speaker:

anything.

Speaker:

Do

Speaker:

anything.

Speaker:

Be on

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

guard.”

“I’m

Speaker:

no

Speaker:

use

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

fight,”

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

deer

Speaker:

mumbles,

Speaker:

shamefully

Speaker:

holding

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

bandaged

Speaker:

hand.

“I’m

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

asking

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

fight

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

former

Speaker:

lover,”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

tell

Speaker:

Vincente. “It’s

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

business.

Speaker:

It

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

pleasure,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

it’s

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

personal.

Speaker:

You

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

done

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

part.

Speaker:

Now

Speaker:

stand

Speaker:

back,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

allow

Speaker:

me.”

I

Speaker:

carefully

Speaker:

nudge

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

door

Speaker:

open.

Speaker:

We’re

Speaker:

met

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

sight

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

room

Speaker:

seemingly

Speaker:

robbed.

Speaker:

In

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

middle,

Speaker:

there

Speaker:

stands

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

brazier,

Speaker:

stuffed

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

brim

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

papers

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

all

Speaker:

sorts.

Speaker:

Some

Speaker:

are

Speaker:

charred,

Speaker:

some

Speaker:

are unburnt.

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

fire

Speaker:

has

Speaker:

been

Speaker:

choked

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

mass

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

paper,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

only

Speaker:

chars

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

smoke

Speaker:

emerge.

Speaker:

Towards

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

ocean,

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

window

Speaker:

hangs

Speaker:

open

Speaker:

all

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

way,

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

its

Speaker:

drapes

Speaker:

blowing

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

sea breeze.

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

room

Speaker:

seems

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

otherwise

Speaker:

vacant.

Speaker:

Bleak

Speaker:

spots

Speaker:

line

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

walls

Speaker:

where

Speaker:

once,

Speaker:

presumably,

Speaker:

paintings

Speaker:

hung.

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

shelves

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

book

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

had

Speaker:

their

Speaker:

contents

Speaker:

spilled

Speaker:

out

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

floor.

Speaker:

Nothing

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

value

Speaker:

ornaments

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

otherwise

Speaker:

fine

Speaker:

room.

Speaker:

And

Speaker:

though

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

room

Speaker:

smells

Speaker:

heavily

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

its

Speaker:

owner,

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

dog

Speaker:

I’m

Speaker:

looking

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

nowhere

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

seen.

“He

Speaker:

can’t

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

gotten

Speaker:

far,”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

mumble. “Check

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

window.

Speaker:

I’ll

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

look

Speaker:

at

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

door

Speaker:

over

Speaker:

there.”

The

Speaker:

deer

Speaker:

nods,

Speaker:

stepping

Speaker:

around

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

towards

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

window.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

hold

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

blade

Speaker:

tightly

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

walk slowly across

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

room, listening

Speaker:

out

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

any

Speaker:

sounds.

It

Speaker:

opens

Speaker:

inwards

Speaker:

onto

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

well sized

Speaker:

bedroom

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

an

Speaker:

eastern

Speaker:

view.

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

sun

Speaker:

shines

Speaker:

through,

Speaker:

low

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

horizon

Speaker:

still,

Speaker:

nearly

Speaker:

blinding

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

peer

Speaker:

inside.

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

sheets have

Speaker:

been

Speaker:

slept

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

recently,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

beyond

Speaker:

that,

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

room

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

vacated.

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

scent

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

him

Speaker:

feels

Speaker:

closer

Speaker:

here

Speaker:

than

Speaker:

anywhere.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

sniff

Speaker:

around.

Speaker:

Had

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

been

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

open

Speaker:

window

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

other

Speaker:

room,

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

could’ve

Speaker:

sworn

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

scent

Speaker:

was

Speaker:

moving

Speaker:

around.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

head

Speaker:

into

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

room,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

check

Speaker:

under

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

bed.

Speaker:

Nothing.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

check

Speaker:

behind

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

drapes

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

window.

Speaker:

Nothing.

Speaker:

Then,

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

I’m

Speaker:

preoccupied

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

search,

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

door

Speaker:

slams

Speaker:

against

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

wall

Speaker:

behind

Speaker:

me.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

twist

Speaker:

around,

Speaker:

just

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

time

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

notice

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

black

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

white

Speaker:

blur,

Speaker:

emerging

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

tower’s

Speaker:

convenience,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

exiting

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

bedroom.

Speaker:

In

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

rush,

Speaker:

he’s

Speaker:

through,

Speaker:

slamming

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

door

Speaker:

behind

Speaker:

him.

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

calls

Speaker:

out,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

voice

Speaker:

cuts

Speaker:

off

Speaker:

mid yell to be

Speaker:

replaced

Speaker:

by

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

choked

Speaker:

gasp.

I

Speaker:

rush

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

door

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

rip

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

open

Speaker:

just

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

time

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

see

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

coattail

Speaker:

disappearing

Speaker:

out

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

room

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

the other

Speaker:

side.

Speaker:

Vincente lays

Speaker:

wheezing

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

floor,

Speaker:

crestfallen,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

otherwise

Speaker:

unharmed.

Speaker:

But

Speaker:

before

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

time

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

get

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

bearings,

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

hear

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

report

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

firearm.

Speaker:

Then,

Speaker:

screams

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

yells

Speaker:

fill

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

tight

Speaker:

stairwell.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

rush

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

door

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

fast

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

can,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

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money

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and

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profit

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excuses

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evil.

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That

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if

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just

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enough

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commerce

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takes

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place,

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if

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money

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is

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being

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made,

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we

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can

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ignore

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the

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plight

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of

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suffer

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it,

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chance

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that

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their

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cubs

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may

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grow

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necessary

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your

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wealth

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requires

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you

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others,

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it

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progress

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inviting,

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a

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cult.”

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little

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be

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excused,

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the

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number

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at

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nations

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old.

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slaves,

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we’re

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slavery.”

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not

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I.”

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I

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snarl

Speaker:

at

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him. “Slavery

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only

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one

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thing,

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Don

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Constantino.

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creates

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people

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like

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me,

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who

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means

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put

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is

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the

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only

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progress

Speaker:

it

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could

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ever

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inspire.”

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last

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vestiges

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of

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the

Speaker:

dalmatian’s smile

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fades

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from

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his

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muzzle.

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I

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think

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he’s starting

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to

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realise

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just

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how

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much

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he’s

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about

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to

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lose

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today.

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study

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the

Speaker:

locket

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I

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picked

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up,

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popping

Speaker:

it

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open

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

a

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gentle

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claw.

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I

Speaker:

know

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immediately

Speaker:

who

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

likenesses

Speaker:

inside

Speaker:

are

Speaker:

meant

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

be.

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can’t

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

that.”

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The

Speaker:

dog

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reaches

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

it,

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but

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I

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snatch

Speaker:

it

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he

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can

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grab

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it. “That’s

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not... T-take

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anything,

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but

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not

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that-“

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do

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you

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suppose

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someone

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might

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care

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about

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it?”

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I

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chide. “Who

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did

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this

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belong

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to?

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If

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I

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peel

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the

Speaker:

portrait

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off,

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will

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I

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find

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another

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one

Speaker:

of

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your

Speaker:

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underneath?

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Is

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

false

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as

Speaker:

your

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words

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

those

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you

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stole

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

their

Speaker:

homes?”

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Speaker:

dog

Speaker:

starts

Speaker:

towards

Speaker:

me.

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I

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my

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cloak

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aside,

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and

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my

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sword,

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which

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makes

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him

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pause.

Speaker:

Then

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his

Speaker:

muzzle

Speaker:

twists

Speaker:

into

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

growl.

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Speaker:

impudent,

Speaker:

dirty

Speaker:

fox,

Speaker:

take

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

paws

Speaker:

off

Speaker:

my-”

“Ah-ah-ah.”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

wave

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

finger

Speaker:

at

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him.

Speaker:

He

Speaker:

reaches

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

sword,

Speaker:

but

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not

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fast

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enough.

Speaker:

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draw

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mine,

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put

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

against

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

neck. “None

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

tongue,

Speaker:

dear

Speaker:

sir.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

wouldn’t

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mind

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

confession

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

lips.

Speaker:

Not

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

will

Speaker:

change

Speaker:

very

Speaker:

much-“

As

Speaker:

if

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on

Speaker:

cue,

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

foreign

Speaker:

sound

Speaker:

cuts

Speaker:

through

Speaker:

our

Speaker:

conversation.

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I

Speaker:

turn

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

good ear

Speaker:

towards

Speaker:

it,

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and

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recognize

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the

Speaker:

beat

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

Vincente’s

Speaker:

cloves

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

the rocks.

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Speaker:

he

Speaker:

yells thorugh

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

cave,

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

voice

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reverberating

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against

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

rock. “Kieran,

Speaker:

stop!”

“Stop?!”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

yell

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

return, “There’s

Speaker:

no

Speaker:

chance

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

now.”

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Speaker:

no,”

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

pants,

Speaker:

running

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

me.

“Vincente,

Speaker:

darling,”

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

dog

Speaker:

tries,

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

honey

Speaker:

smooth

Speaker:

voice

Speaker:

somewhat

Speaker:

choked

Speaker:

by

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

cold

Speaker:

steel

Speaker:

against

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

throat. “Tell

Speaker:

this...

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

fox

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here...

Speaker:

Tell

Speaker:

him

Speaker:

everything.”

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

hound

Speaker:

turns

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

quickly

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

deer

Speaker:

approaches,

Speaker:

ears

Speaker:

laid

Speaker:

back,

Speaker:

sputtering. “He

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

I,

Speaker:

we

Speaker:

share

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

blame.

Speaker:

None

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

us

Speaker:

are

Speaker:

truly

Speaker:

responsible,

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

cannot

Speaker:

hold

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

accountable

Speaker:

for-“

“Silence!”

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

calls,

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

voice

Speaker:

ringing

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

ears

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

comes

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

me. “You

Speaker:

would

Speaker:

throw

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

wolves,

Speaker:

wouldn’t

Speaker:

you?

Speaker:

You’d

Speaker:

betray

Speaker:

everything

Speaker:

we

Speaker:

had

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

chance

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

save

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

precious

Speaker:

coat.”

“Vincente,

Speaker:

This

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

part,”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

tell

Speaker:

him. “It

Speaker:

would

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

better

Speaker:

if

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

left

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

it.

Speaker:

Please

Speaker:

allow

Speaker:

me.”

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Speaker:

Sir,”

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

persists. “Allow

Speaker:

me.”

Speaker:

He

Speaker:

shoulders

Speaker:

past

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

gets

Speaker:

right

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

former

Speaker:

lover’s

Speaker:

face. “This

Speaker:

fox

Speaker:

here

Speaker:

did

Speaker:

more

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

one

Speaker:

night

Speaker:

than

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

done

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

five

Speaker:

years.”

Speaker:

He

Speaker:

holds

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

bloodied

Speaker:

paw.

“Dearie,

Speaker:

what

Speaker:

happened-”

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Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

pushes

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

dalmatian

Speaker:

away

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

blade,

Speaker:

so

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

crashes

Speaker:

against

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

grating.

Speaker:

Then he

Speaker:

punches

Speaker:

him,

Speaker:

right

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

snout.

Speaker:

With

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

injured

Speaker:

hand.

Speaker:

He

Speaker:

lets

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

yell

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

anger

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

pain,

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

Don

Speaker:

Constantino

Speaker:

falls

Speaker:

backwards

Speaker:

into

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

water.

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

dog

Speaker:

fumbles

Speaker:

against

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

metal

Speaker:

grating

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

falls,

Speaker:

lodging

Speaker:

an

Speaker:

arm

Speaker:

through

Speaker:

one

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

grates.

Speaker:

But

Speaker:

before

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

can

Speaker:

get

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

feet,

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

gate

Speaker:

creaks

Speaker:

under

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

weight,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

breaks

Speaker:

off

Speaker:

its

Speaker:

rusty

Speaker:

hinges,

Speaker:

splashing

Speaker:

onto

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

sands

Speaker:

below. I

Speaker:

hear

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

cry

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

shock,

Speaker:

drowned

Speaker:

out

Speaker:

by

Speaker:

sputters

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

coughs,

Speaker:

as

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

dalmatian

Speaker:

goes

Speaker:

down

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

it.

Speaker:

When

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

tries

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

rise

Speaker:

again,

Speaker:

he

Speaker:

comes

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

short,

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

arm

Speaker:

trapped.

Speaker:

Only

Speaker:

managing

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

gain

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

few

Speaker:

inches

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

shallow

Speaker:

pool

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

water,

Speaker:

he looks back at his

Speaker:

former lover

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

shock.

“You

Speaker:

spineless

Speaker:

coward,”

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

growls. “You

Speaker:

murderer!

Speaker:

You

Speaker:

thief!

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

should have

Speaker:

stopped you

Speaker:

sooner.

Speaker:

Should have

Speaker:

set

Speaker:

things

Speaker:

right.

Speaker:

But

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

believed

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

honeyed

Speaker:

words.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

trusted

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

commanding

Speaker:

officer…

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

trusted

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

all

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

way

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

flaming

Speaker:

hells,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

now

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

see

Speaker:

who

Speaker:

we

Speaker:

truly

Speaker:

are.

“He’s

Speaker:

going

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

kill

Speaker:

me.”

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

dalmatian

Speaker:

squeaks,

Speaker:

weakly. “Do

Speaker:

something!”

“To

Speaker:

me,

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

died

Speaker:

long

Speaker:

ago.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

didn’t

Speaker:

want

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

face

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

fact.

Speaker:

But

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

fox

Speaker:

helped

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

open

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

eyes.”

“He

Speaker:

hurt

Speaker:

you?”

“He

Speaker:

did.

Speaker:

For

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

foolishness,

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

suffer.

Speaker:

But

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

dignity

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

will

Speaker:

take

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

grave,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

more

Speaker:

than

Speaker:

can

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

said

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

you.

Speaker:

You

Speaker:

always

Speaker:

were

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

fairweather

Speaker:

companion,

Speaker:

changing

Speaker:

allegiances

Speaker:

with

Speaker:

every

Speaker:

tide.”

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

walks

Speaker:

over

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

stand

Speaker:

over

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

former

Speaker:

lover,

Speaker:

staring

Speaker:

at

Speaker:

him

Speaker:

without

Speaker:

emotion. “Well...

Speaker:

When

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

tides

Speaker:

come

Speaker:

now,

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

won’t

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

free

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

choose.”

“Look,

Speaker:

Vincente.

Speaker:

We

Speaker:

can

Speaker:

escape

Speaker:

together.

Speaker:

You

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

I.

Speaker:

Nobody

Speaker:

needs

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

know.

Speaker:

Just

Speaker:

kill

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

fox,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

it’ll

Speaker:

all be

Speaker:

over.”

“I

Speaker:

don’t

Speaker:

know

Speaker:

what’s

Speaker:

more

Speaker:

pathetic.

Speaker:

That

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

believe

Speaker:

what

Speaker:

you’re

Speaker:

saying,”

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

bends

Speaker:

down,

Speaker:

stripping

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

dalmatian

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

sword

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

knife,

Speaker:

throwing

Speaker:

them

Speaker:

beyond

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

reach, “Or

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

once

Speaker:

did.”

“W-wait,”

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

dog

Speaker:

cries.

Speaker:

He

Speaker:

yanks

Speaker:

at

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

arm,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

grating

Speaker:

must

Speaker:

weigh

Speaker:

hundreds

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

pounds,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

he’s

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

getting

Speaker:

anywhere.

“Kieran.”

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

sighs. “I’ve

Speaker:

said

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

piece.

Speaker:

I’ll

Speaker:

wait

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

you topside.”

In

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

background,

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

dog

Speaker:

cries

Speaker:

out

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

help,

Speaker:

but

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

cave

Speaker:

swallows

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

shouts,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

incoming

Speaker:

waves

Speaker:

distort it

Speaker:

into

Speaker:

wordless

Speaker:

noise.

“I

Speaker:

think

Speaker:

I’m

Speaker:

done

Speaker:

here,

Speaker:

too.

Speaker:

There’s

Speaker:

nothing

Speaker:

more

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

said.”

“Wha-What?!”

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

dalmatian

Speaker:

shouts. “Y-you

Speaker:

can’t

Speaker:

mean

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

leave

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

here?

Speaker:

T-to

Speaker:

drown?

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

request

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

lawyer.

Speaker:

A

Speaker:

court

Speaker:

case.”

“Do

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

know

Speaker:

any

Speaker:

prayers?”

The

Speaker:

dalmatian

Speaker:

shakes

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

head.

I

Speaker:

shrug. “The

Speaker:

judge

Speaker:

will

Speaker:

see

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

soon.

Speaker:

Good

Speaker:

luck.”

On

Speaker:

our

Speaker:

way

Speaker:

back

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

surface,

Speaker:

we’re

Speaker:

met

Speaker:

by

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

garrison,

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

whom

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

deliver

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

brief,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

an

Speaker:

apology

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

fate

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

their

Speaker:

commander.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

turn

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

wealth

Speaker:

over

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

garrison

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

benefit

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

island,

Speaker:

regretting

Speaker:

only

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

can

Speaker:

never

Speaker:

set

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

rights

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

wrongs

Speaker:

Constantino

Speaker:

caused.

***

Once

Speaker:

aboard

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

skiff

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

will

Speaker:

take

Speaker:

us

Speaker:

into

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

bay

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

Dalmatia,

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

instruct

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

young

Speaker:

hare

Speaker:

sailor

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

take

Speaker:

us

Speaker:

around

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

south

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

island,

Speaker:

where

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

scout

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

cave

Speaker:

mouth.

Speaker:

The tides

Speaker:

are

Speaker:

coming

Speaker:

in,

Speaker:

so

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

going

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

tricky,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

we

Speaker:

can’t

Speaker:

get

Speaker:

very

Speaker:

close.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

can

Speaker:

barely

Speaker:

glimpse

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

cave

Speaker:

mouth,

Speaker:

almost

Speaker:

fully

Speaker:

submerged.

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

spits

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

general

Speaker:

direction

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

keep,

Speaker:

before

Speaker:

sitting

Speaker:

down

Speaker:

glumly

Speaker:

at

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

bow

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

boat.

I

Speaker:

seat

Speaker:

myself

Speaker:

beside

Speaker:

him,

Speaker:

lending

Speaker:

him

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

nearness.

Speaker:

For

Speaker:

all

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

experience,

Speaker:

I’m

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

used

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

bringing

Speaker:

back...

Speaker:

prisoners?

Speaker:

Rescued

Speaker:

victims?

Speaker:

I’m

Speaker:

not

Speaker:

sure

Speaker:

what

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

name

Speaker:

him.

“Do

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

think

Speaker:

they’ll

Speaker:

want

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

back?”

Speaker:

Vincente

Speaker:

asks

Speaker:

after

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

while.

“Who?”

“Abruzzi,” he mumbles. “I yearn

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

her,

Speaker:

more

Speaker:

than

Speaker:

anything.

Speaker:

There’s

Speaker:

no

Speaker:

other

Speaker:

place

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

God’s

Speaker:

earth

Speaker:

I’d

Speaker:

rather

Speaker:

be.”

“Nobody

Speaker:

aboard

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

ship

Speaker:

will

Speaker:

have

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

finer

Speaker:

letter

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

recommendation

Speaker:

drafted."

“Even

Speaker:

now,

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

struggle

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

believe

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

deserve

Speaker:

that,”

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

deer

Speaker:

sighs. “I’m

Speaker:

no

Speaker:

innocent

Speaker:

man,

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

know

Speaker:

that.

Speaker:

But

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

instead

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

having

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

hanged,

Speaker:

you are

Speaker:

helping

Speaker:

me.

Speaker:

If

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

ruse,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

I’m

Speaker:

just

Speaker:

being

Speaker:

strung

Speaker:

along

Speaker:

towards

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

dungeon...

Speaker:

would you

Speaker:

tell

Speaker:

me?”

Speaker:

He

Speaker:

holds

Speaker:

up

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

paw,

Speaker:

freshly

Speaker:

bandaged. “If

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

is

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

gallows,

Speaker:

then

Speaker:

hang

Speaker:

me

Speaker:

in sight of

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

ship.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

wish

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

see

Speaker:

her

Speaker:

one

Speaker:

last

Speaker:

time.”

“Not

Speaker:

at

Speaker:

all,

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

friend,”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

reassure

Speaker:

him. “I’ve

Speaker:

never

Speaker:

felt

Speaker:

so

Speaker:

inclined

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

show

Speaker:

mercy

Speaker:

before.

Speaker:

Maybe

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

means

Speaker:

something,

Speaker:

who

Speaker:

can

Speaker:

say?

Speaker:

If

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

can

Speaker:

take

Speaker:

just

Speaker:

one

Speaker:

good

Speaker:

man

Speaker:

from

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

wretched

Speaker:

society,

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

give

Speaker:

him

Speaker:

back to

Speaker:

our

Speaker:

world,

Speaker:

then I will

Speaker:

call

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

good

Speaker:

thing.

Speaker:

But

Speaker:

I will

Speaker:

say

Speaker:

this

Speaker:

only

Speaker:

once.

Speaker:

Never

Speaker:

forget

Speaker:

our

Speaker:

meeting

Speaker:

here.”

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

lay

Speaker:

a paw on

Speaker:

his

Speaker:

shoulder. “Just

Speaker:

prove

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

world

Speaker:

that

Speaker:

my

Speaker:

mercy

Speaker:

was

Speaker:

worth

Speaker:

a

Speaker:

damn.

Speaker:

I

Speaker:

beg

Speaker:

you.”

“I’ll

Speaker:

promise,

Speaker:

fox.

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

next

Speaker:

time

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

see

Speaker:

me,

Speaker:

it

Speaker:

will

Speaker:

be

Speaker:

in

Speaker:

blue

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

gold.”

Vincente

Speaker:

smiles

Speaker:

at

Speaker:

me.

And

Speaker:

we

Speaker:

never

Speaker:

meet

Speaker:

again.




This

Speaker:

was

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

second

Speaker:

and

Speaker:

final

Speaker:

part

Speaker:

of “A

Speaker:

Fox

Speaker:

Walks

Speaker:

Into

Speaker:

A

Speaker:

Bar”

Speaker:

by

Speaker:

Spottystuff,

Speaker:

read

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

by

Speaker:

Solomon

Speaker:

Harries,

Speaker:

cuddly

Speaker:

badger dad.

As

Speaker:

always, you can

Speaker:

find

Speaker:

more

Speaker:

stories

Speaker:

on

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

web at

Speaker:

thevoice.dog,

Speaker:

or

Speaker:

find

Speaker:

the

Speaker:

show

Speaker:

wherever

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

get

Speaker:

your

Speaker:

podcasts.

Speaker:

Thank

Speaker:

you

Speaker:

for

Speaker:

listening

Speaker:

to

Speaker:

The

Speaker:

Voice

Speaker:

of

Speaker:

Dog.

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About the Podcast

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The Voice of Dog
Furry stories to warm the ol' cockles, read by Rob MacWolf and guests. If you have a story that would suit the show, you can get in touch with @VoiceOfDog@meow.social on Mastodon, @voiceofdog.bsky.social on Blue Sky, or @Theodwulf on Telegram.

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Khaki