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“Unseeing” by Madison Scott-Clary (part 2 of 2, read by the author herself)
Today’s story is the second and final part of “Unseeing” by Madison Scott-Clary, whose graphomania occasionally gets the better of her. Unseeing is one of the stories featured in the prehistoric furry anthology When The World Was Young, available December 1. Excavate more information at fhfs.ink. You can find more of her writing, from short stories and poems to novels and a memoir, over at makyo.ink.
Last time, Lyut, ever faithful, was gifted with sight by the trickster god Týw - a god who had been unknown to him before. Confronted with this change, he has to learn how to move in the world once more.
Today's story will be read for you by the author herself.
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https://thevoice.dog/episode/unseeing-by-madison-scott-clary-part-2-of-2-read-by-the-author-herself
Transcript
You’re listening to The Voice of Dog,
Speaker:and Today’s story is the second
Speaker:and final part of
Speaker:“Unseeing” by Madison Scott-Clary,
Speaker:whose graphomania occasionally gets the better of her.
Speaker:Unseeing is one of the stories featured in the prehistoric furry anthology
Speaker:When The World Was Young,
Speaker:available December 1.
Speaker:Excavate more information
Speaker:at fhfs.ink.
Speaker:You can find more of her writing, from short stories and poems
Speaker:to novels and a memoir,
Speaker:over at makyo.ink.
Speaker:Last time, Lyut, ever faithful,
Speaker:was gifted with sight by the trickster god Týw -
Speaker:a god who had been unknown to him before.
Speaker:Confronted with this change,
Speaker:he has to learn how to move in the world once more.
Speaker:Please enjoy “Unseeing”
Speaker:by Madison Scott-Clary,
Speaker:Part 2 of 2, read for you
Speaker:by the author herself.
Speaker:Lyut is slow to begin moving, and when he does, he walks as though a great dream has come upon him.
Speaker:He lets Ýng guide his movements and I stand apart from the lord and Their servant.
Speaker:Lyut moves as though a great dream has come upon him and lets Ýng guide him,
Speaker:and even so his morning task of making incense is far slower than usual,
Speaker:for his eyes water constantly and he marvels at just how drab the ingredients,
Speaker:so bright and colorful in the nostrils and so familiar to the touch, are to behold.
Speaker:He has not known the comparison of color before,
Speaker:but even to one for whom sight is a new sense, he is surprised to find that the crushed root of nardin
Speaker:and the shaved root of sweet flag look so similar despite the vast difference in aromas and purposes,
Speaker:that the mastic, that steadfast base of a scent,
Speaker:nearly glitters in the sun while the jewel-bright scent of cardamom
Speaker:is belied by so dun a color.
Speaker:He moves as though a great dream has come upon him
Speaker:until it is time to lay the powdered incense in the bowl of ash,
Speaker:that third prayer of creation,
Speaker:and he realizes that he can see the furrow he digs in ash with his claw,
Speaker:can see the tan powder that he packs in its place,
Speaker:and can see the spiral he builds, and then tears come upon him once more,
Speaker:and all of his prayers of destruction are completed through sight blurred by shock,
Speaker:and he relies on his habits and Ýng’s guidance to make it through to the end without burning himself.
Speaker:I stand apart from the lord and Their servant and watch,
Speaker:and drink in what prayers I may along the way.
Speaker:At last, the time for ritual passes and Lyut stumbles into the woods to tend to his toilet and lingers a while in wonder at the sight of his own body,
Speaker:the sight of the woods and the leaves and humus on the forest floor, before returning to his cave and,
Speaker:out of the habit of so many years, grabbing his stick to guide him down to the river.
Speaker:“Do you need that, faithful?”
Speaker:After a moment’s confusion, the fisher laughs.
Speaker:“I suppose I do not, Týw.”
Speaker:“Will you leave it behind?”
Speaker:His answer is a long time in coming.
Speaker:“It is comforting in my paw.
Speaker:I will take it with me.”
Speaker:Guided still by habit — and perhaps by Ýng, for I do not know the lord’s every thought —
Speaker:Lyut taps his way down the path to the water,
Speaker:and perhaps it is for the best that he has brought the stick,
Speaker:for his eyes are drawn constantly to every detail along the way,
Speaker:from the way the suns arrow strikes the leaves to the way their shadows dance across the ground when the wind moves across them.
Speaker:His eyes water still, for he is overflowing with sensation.
Speaker:A life lived without a sense is still a full life,
Speaker:and to one born without that sense,
Speaker:raised without that sense,
Speaker:he did not think of himself as blind except in comparison to Zita
Speaker:who picked up the amphorae of incense with such ease that he had never known.
Speaker:Stops, at last, at the edge of the stream and stares at my domain,
Speaker:mouth open as though to speak,
Speaker:though no words come forth.
Speaker:I wait a while, and then ask:
Speaker:“Faithful, do you see the wonder of my creation?
Speaker:My friend the water?”
Speaker:“I had never imagined that it looked like this.”
Speaker:His voice is barely above a whisper,
Speaker:and his eyes drink deep of the sight of the stream.
Speaker:“I did not know that something could be as beautiful.”
Speaker:This fills me more than any prayer yet that day.
Speaker:“I am the god of the water and the god of watching and the god of the moon and death.
Speaker:When you come here to fish,
Speaker:when you come here to bathe,
Speaker:when you come here to drink, those are praises that you sing to me.”
Speaker:Lyut tilts his head.
Speaker:“Is Ýng not the god of all things?
Speaker:I am sorry for asking again, but I must know.”
Speaker:“They are the god of many things, and They are the god of me.
Speaker:To sing praises to me is to sing praises to Them in turn.”
Speaker:At this, I feel the lord’s anger at me soften, though it does not wholly retreat.
Speaker:“I do not know the words to any prayers to you, Týw.”
Speaker:“That is alright, faithful.
Speaker:You may pray all the same by fishing and bathing and drinking,
Speaker:by rejoicing in those things that are under my jurisdiction.”
Speaker:Lyut nods and steps into the water.
Speaker:This is not the usual order of his mornings,
Speaker:but as the wonder on his face at the sight of the water moving around his legs fills me to overflowing,
Speaker:I do not complain.
Speaker:He stands in the middle of the section of the stream that is his own,
Speaker:in the pool held up by the narrow gap across which he strings his net,
Speaker:in the cool water where the sun’s arrow pierces the canopy of the trees.
Speaker:He stands there and he watches the way that the light reflects off the surface of the water.
Speaker:Watches, too, the way the water eddies around rocks,
Speaker:around his legs, explores the funnels of whirlpools with his fingers,
Speaker:peers through clear water to the silt and rocks and algae below the surface.
Speaker:“What am I now, Týw?”
Speaker:“What do you mean, faithful?”
Speaker:“Before this morning, before today, when I did not see,
Speaker:I was complete.” I remain silent.
Speaker:“I am sorry, god of water and of watching.
Speaker:I do not doubt you, for your gift has spoken for you.
Speaker:I do not turn away your gift, and I offer my praise to you.
Speaker:But if I was complete before and a servant to Ýng,
Speaker:then what am I now?”
Speaker:I watch him curiously, this servant of mine and of my lord’s,
Speaker:standing in the middle of a pool in a stream where his thighs are steeped the cool water.
Speaker:“You are Lyut, faithful of Ýng,
Speaker:faithful of Týw. Has that changed with your sight?”
Speaker:He runs his hand above the water, feeling the boundary between water and air with his pawpads.
Speaker:He feels the surface tension of the pool, and through him I feel his wonder.
Speaker:He tests and plays as might a kit of his people even as he begins bathing.
Speaker:Each time he comes up for air, he sings a line of praise to Ýng, and every time he is beneath the water,
Speaker:I know that he is thinking about what he is now.
Speaker:Each time he dives, he is singing his praises to me as well,
Speaker:and now he is cognizant of this as well.
Speaker:After he has said his prayer and cleaned himself
Speaker:he wades to his net in which he finds three small fish.
Speaker:He gives thanks to Ýng and, after a moment, to me as well.
Speaker:With the fish on the shore, wrapped in net and stunned,
Speaker:gasping and drowning in air,
Speaker:Lyut watches. He watches them glitter and wiggle.
Speaker:He watches them die their slow deaths.
Speaker:He traces sun-struck scales with a claw and asks:
Speaker:“Do the fish see beneath the water, Týw?”
Speaker:“Yes, faithful. They see my domain and all its beauties.”
Speaker:“Do they smell beneath the water?”
Speaker:“After a fashion, yes.”
Speaker:“Do they smell my incense?”
Speaker:“No, faithful. The boundary between the domain of air and the domain of water is too firm for the smoke of your incense to pass.
Speaker:After all, do you smell your incense beneath water?”
Speaker:“No, I do not breathe under the water.”
Speaker:Lyut looks angry, then laughs.
Speaker:“Only, I wonder.” “Yes, Lyut?”
Speaker:“I wonder if the fish upon the shore here has the chance to smell the incense and hear the prayers to Ýng before it dies.”
Speaker:I do not answer directly,
saying instead:“You are not going to die, faithful.”
saying instead:He looks satisfied at this answer and I realize that I have said what he needed to hear.
saying instead:I know that Lyut holds terror in his breast even still,
saying instead:that he will hold it there until the end of his days, for I have taken his innocence from him.
saying instead:I am pleased to see his satisfaction, and I sense Ýng’s bemusement at my anxiety over pleasing a servant.
saying instead:I am pleased all the same, and I remain with my servant.
saying instead:I am with Lyut as he gathers his fiddlehead ferns and pawfuls of clay.
saying instead:I am with him as he sets his net once more.
saying instead:I am with him as he cleans his fish and heads back to his cave to prepare his daily meal.
saying instead:Three times, he closes his eyes and his whiskers droop as he attempts to settle back into his unseeing routine.
saying instead:He is testing himself, I know, and I do not stop him.
saying instead:I do not stop him because I know that when his eyes are open, he is closer to me,
saying instead:to Týw the watchful,
saying instead:and when his eyes are closed, he is closer to our lord, Ýng,
saying instead:the god of all things,
saying instead:and it is good for him to understand this.
saying instead:He closes his eyes to shut out the sight of preparing his meal,
saying instead:too confused by the twisting of the ferns around his fish.
saying instead:The leaves which make so much sense to his long-practiced fingers do not behave to his eyes the ways in which he expects.
saying instead:He closes his eyes to eat his food after cracking open the clay baker,
saying instead:for the sight of the fish changed by fire is unnerving.
saying instead:The change in texture he had always known had changed, as too with the taste,
saying instead:for Lyut was no stranger to the flavor of raw fish.
saying instead:Now, sight-ridden,
saying instead:he finds the taste of the fish reduced when his eyes are opened, as though too much of him,
saying instead:of his mind, his being,
saying instead:is taken up processing that which he sees.
saying instead:And he closes his eyes, last,
saying instead:when he lays on the ground to dry and meditate.
saying instead:He closes his eyes as he lays on his front,
saying instead:and then when he rolls onto his back, he keeps them closed, and I see his cheeks wet with tears. “Speak to me,
saying instead:faithful. Why are you troubled?”
saying instead:“You say that you are the god of watching, yes?”
saying instead:“I am.” “Must watching always be with sight?”
saying instead:Again, I do not answer directly.
saying instead:“Do you wish now that you had not regained your sight?”
saying instead:“It is too much, Týw.”
saying instead:“You are strong, faithful.”
saying instead:“It is too much.” He shakes his head.
saying instead:“I feel less holy.
saying instead:I feel less pure when distracted by seeing.
saying instead:How can I serve Ýng as faithfully
saying instead:now that my time spent watching is time spent serving you?”
saying instead:I feel Ýng’s anger rising against me once more,
saying instead:and I answer carefully.
saying instead:“To live is to be holy,
saying instead:to live and rejoice in life,
saying instead:to be pure and clean in your actions and words. Ýng
saying instead:is the lord of all things,
saying instead:and to Their servants They gave life as a way for the universe to recognize its own beauty
saying instead:and wonder.” Lyut’s face twists in a anger.
saying instead:“And yet I cannot hear Ýng as well today as I did yesterday.
saying instead:He is with me, I know,
saying instead:but…” “The only mind which can hear as purely as it sees when both eyes and ears are open is that of Ýng, true,
saying instead:and yet in seeing, do you not also praise Them?
saying instead:It was They who made seeing as well as hearing.
saying instead:It was They who made me.”
saying instead:At his his features soften.
saying instead:His words are slow, and he processes his thoughts and feelings aloud.
saying instead:“I, as a servant, do not understand the hierarchy of the gods, but,
saying instead:yes, if Ýng made the light and the sun and colors and also you,
saying instead:then I suppose I pray to him as easily by rejoicing in sight as I do in sound and touch.”
saying instead:The sun is overhead and tipping down its long path through the afternoon.
saying instead:The colors of the trees are bright and I am with Lyut.
saying instead:“Rejoice, then, in your sight, faithful,
saying instead:for in doing so, you offer prayer to Ýng and to myself.”
saying instead:A slow minute passes as the fisher meditates.
saying instead:At last, he opens his eyes and looks up to the trees and cloudless sky.
saying instead:“I will try, Týw.” “That is all we ever ask of our servants, Lyut.”
saying instead:When Zita comes up from the village, bearing an armload of flatbread and a small basket full of spice cakes for Lyut,
saying instead:he had since ceased his conversation with Týw and had ceased meditating by laying on the ground,
saying instead:and had instead settled for sitting cross-legged in the entrance to his cave looking out. Zita sang as she walked,
saying instead:as she had for the last ten festival weeks that this had been her duty, and so Lyut hears her before he saw her.
saying instead:He debates for thirty heartbeats whether or not he is willing to keep his eyes open for her arrival.
saying instead:He debates whether or not he is willing to see, to perceive someone with senses other than those he had been born with.
saying instead:Lyut makes up his mind and closes his eyes when he hears Zita rounding the curve of the path toward the clearing before his cave.
saying instead:He sees her shadow move in the trees,
saying instead:he sees a hint of her between the trunks, and all courage fails him in that moment.
saying instead:“Faithful, why do you close your eyes?”
saying instead:Lyut stays silent.
saying instead:“As you wish, faithful, but know:
saying instead:while some miracles are private and must be held close to the heart,
saying instead:not all of them,
saying instead:and to hide this one would be to live a lie before me and before the village.”
saying instead:“I am not brave enough.”
saying instead:Zita’s singing crescendos as she enters the clearing, then abruptly stops.
saying instead:Lyut supposes that because he is not sitting in the customary place with the customary smile on his face,
saying instead:that she must sense in him some change beyond her ken,
saying instead:and at this, his fear only grows.
saying instead:He turns over what I had said within his head.
saying instead:He turns it over ten times and considers the ramifications of it.
saying instead:Were he to keep his newfound sense a secret,
saying instead:then yes, he would in some way be living a lie.
saying instead:He would have sight at his disposal and yet the village would know not of the incredible power of the gods that had granted it to him.
saying instead:And yet there was terror to be had at the thought of anyone finding out.
saying instead:He was holy in part because of his unseeing, was he not?
saying instead:He was pure before Ýng at all times, and he was pure in the ways that the village could not be,
saying instead:for that was his role as the ascetic,
saying instead:as the incense-maker, as blind Lyut.
saying instead:And yet to lie is to sully oneself.
saying instead:To lie before the village was to betray his role as ascetic
saying instead:and to make himself less holy in the eyes of Ýng.
saying instead:To tell the truth was to test the village and change tradition,
saying instead:but to lie was to destroy it for the sake of the village.
saying instead:To live a lie until Ýng took him and decided at what point in the endless cycle
saying instead:should be placed his death was too terrible a thought,
saying instead:and the need to tell truth,
saying instead:to remain as pure as he could be, won over in his
saying instead:mind. “Lyut?” Zita speaks, tentative.
saying instead:And so he opens his eyes.
saying instead:He opens his eyes.
saying instead:He opens his seeing eyes and looks across the clearing and sees Zita there,
saying instead:shorter than him,
saying instead:softer and rounder than him.
saying instead:Too, she is better fed than him —
saying instead:though that is not his place in the world —
saying instead:but she is different on a level more fundamental than any he could have imagined.
saying instead:She is, he thinks,
saying instead:unlike anything he had expected her to be.
saying instead:He smiles. “Zita.” That he had opened his eyes and looked upon her seems to startle Zita,
saying instead:and she takes a half-pace back away from the cave.
saying instead:He speaks as calmly as he is able, but he does so quickly as to preempt her leaving.
saying instead:“Zita, Ýng has blessed me this day.
saying instead:Ýng and his servant have blessed me,
saying instead:and when I awoke and opened my eyes, I saw.
saying instead:I saw for the first time.”
saying instead:She frowns and walks toward him.
saying instead:She moves slowly, and then steps a few paces to the side when she is halfway across the clearing to approach him from a diagonal.
saying instead:It is a test, I know,
saying instead:and when his eyes track her movements, she rushes to him and sets down the bread and cakes beside him.
saying instead:“Ýng has done this?”
saying instead:she says quickly and quietly.
saying instead:“Ýng has worked a wonder!
saying instead:Such a wonder!” “Yes,”
saying instead:Lyut says. It is a small lie, but one easily fixed when first the topic of me,
saying instead:of the god of sight and of watching comes up.
saying instead:“Ýng has granted me sight.
saying instead:I have been praying and meditating,
saying instead:and I do not yet wholly know the reason why.”
saying instead:Zita’s eyes dart this way and that as though to take in all of his face,
saying instead:to look at his eyes and to check for the scars that Lyut had sometimes felt beneath his fur while washing,
saying instead:though he knew not where they came from.
saying instead:At last, she looks into his eyes for a long while.
saying instead:This makes Lyut uncomfortable,
saying instead:and he does not rightly know why.
saying instead:Was there something to behold there?
saying instead:He can see her eyes,
saying instead:and is seeing them for the first time, and to do so fills him with anxiety.
saying instead:They are round and dark, and seem to be made of a ring of brown surrounding a circle of black,
saying instead:and as her eyes move,
saying instead:he sees that the circle of black sometimes grows larger or smaller,
saying instead:though perhaps it is some trick of the light.
saying instead:But those were simply the mechanics of sight.
saying instead:He can see her eyes, yet he feels that to look directly into the eyes of someone else is to truly
saying instead:see them, and he worries that,
saying instead:on some level, Zita will be able to read his thoughts and fears,
saying instead:that she will know deeper secrets about him than he could possibly ever know about her.
saying instead:Was this some knowledge of the sighted that he must someday learn himself?
saying instead:As well, this close to her and
saying instead:he can smell her better than he ever had before, and she is in no way,
saying instead:in no sense unpleasant.
saying instead:The feeling of being sullied
saying instead:and unholy hangs around him like a cloud.
saying instead:He asks, then, quietly:
saying instead:“What do you see, Zita?”
saying instead:“I see you as I always see you, but I see you with your eyes open and clear,
saying instead:where they used to be cloudy and dim,
saying instead:and I see your fur brown and thick
saying instead:without the scars that my mother says have lined your eyes since you were born.”
saying instead:“Yes, but what do you see?”
saying instead:Zita finally averts her eyes, though only to pick up a cake from the basket and split it in two,
saying instead:holding out one half for Lyut and keeping the other for herself.
saying instead:The cake is the color of the sun and bespecked with the cassia and cardamom which had gone into the incense.
saying instead:“I see that Ýng has wrought a miracle
saying instead:and that our time of fasting and keeping holy has led to something truly wondrous.”
saying instead:Lyut lets his shoulders relax from a tenseness he had not known he was holding,
saying instead:and he accepts the spiced cake from her.
saying instead:“I see. Thank you, Zita.
saying instead:I have been praying and meditating on this all day,
saying instead:and though I know I must not,
saying instead:I doubted this miracle and felt unholy.”
saying instead:She bites into her cake and chews,
saying instead:her eyes focusing seemingly on nothing.
saying instead:Lyut can hardly read her expression, so new is his sight,
saying instead:so he remains silent.
saying instead:She swallows her cake and says:
saying instead:“I think that you are as holy now as you were at the beginning of the time of fasting.
saying instead:You have kept holy as have those who came before you,
saying instead:and the village has kept holy,
saying instead:and perhaps the whole world has kept holy,
saying instead:and now Ýng has provided for us a new thing.”
saying instead:Lyut eats his spice cake and thinks on this.
saying instead:He thinks about what I had told him.
saying instead:He thinks about the shock of sight, still so new to him that the brightness and colors in the world sting his eyes
saying instead:and bring him to tears.
saying instead:He thinks of the newness in things that have always been there.
saying instead:He thinks of how overwhelmed he is by this mere fact,
saying instead:and he thinks about how small he is before Týw
saying instead:and smaller still before his lord.
saying instead:He thinks about how small he is
saying instead:and realizes that his devotion burns more strongly within him than it had ever before.
saying instead:And, though he does not know or understand my motives,
saying instead:he knows that any servant,
saying instead:that every servant of Ýng’s is master of him,
saying instead:for the most holy are truly the servants of servants.
saying instead:He thinks about this and then he smiles to Zita once more and nods.
saying instead:“Yes. Yes, this is a new thing that Ýng and his servant Týw have done, and in their presence
saying instead:I will continue to be holy.”
saying instead:Zita tilts her head to one side, and Lyut wonders if perhaps she had not heard well.
saying instead:“Who is Týw?” I break my long silence and say,
saying instead:“I am.” Lyut stiffens and Zita startles to her feet.
saying instead:“I am Týw, and I am the god of the water and of the moon and of watching and of death,
saying instead:and I am servant to Ýng,
saying instead:and I have given sight to Lyut.”
saying instead:When Zita understands, she falls to her knees and prostrates herself before Lyut,
saying instead:seeing no one else to bow before.
saying instead:“A spirit! A spirit!”
saying instead:Lyut laughs at this, though not unkindly.
saying instead:“I believe Týw, that they are the god of the water and of watching,
saying instead:though I know not what the moon is.
saying instead:I have prayed to Ýng about this and I believe that Týw is Their servant.”
saying instead:“I am. I have given Lyut sight and Ýng is watching all of us.”
saying instead:“I cannot see you, though,”
saying instead:Zita says. “As the sun is too dear to look at, so are the gods, faithful.”
saying instead:“How can I be your faithful?”
saying instead:There is an edge of frustration to her voice,
saying instead:and her tail dances about behind her.
saying instead:I accept her agitation just as I accepted that of Lyut.
saying instead:“Every time you bathe or drink pure water,
saying instead:every time you keep watch on the world,
saying instead:every time you behold the beauty of the moon, and every time you mourn the dead,
saying instead:you give praise to me,
saying instead:for not all prayers are in words, as Lyut well knows.”
saying instead:He nods in agreement.
saying instead:“These things are my dominion
saying instead:and Ýng is my lord in turn.”
saying instead:Zita sits up slowly.
saying instead:Still frowning, she considers this.
saying instead:“Why have you given Lyut sight?”
saying instead:“That is not for you to know, faithful, not yet.
saying instead:There will be a time when you may, however.”
saying instead:She relaxes at my words, for she knows the workings of the gods and the mystery therein almost as well as Lyut does.
saying instead:“Now, it is almost evening,”
saying instead:I say. “Put away the bread and the cakes lest the night animals take them.”
saying instead:Zita nods and moves to help Lyut gather his food before remembering that he can see the basket and the flat loaves of bread as well as she,
saying instead:and they laugh together.
saying instead:After the food is put away, both fishers kneel together and begin to pray aloud to Ýng.
saying instead:They who make the world,
saying instead:They who end it, They who bring the thunder, In Tsuari which fell...
saying instead:I let them finish their prayer and bask in the jubilant way that Zita’s voice rings out to her lord.
saying instead:When they finish,
saying instead:Zita smiles to Lyut and stands once more.
saying instead:“I must go down to the village and tell them of this miracle.
saying instead:Tonight you will see the moon, holy one,
saying instead:and know its beauty and that will be your praise to Týw.”
saying instead:The thought fills me with joy, for the moon is indeed beautiful,
saying instead:and I watch Zita put her arms around Lyut in an embrace —
saying instead:his first in many years —
saying instead:before departing down to the village once more.
saying instead:Lyut stays up late into the night at the promise of the moon.
saying instead:Night is not day, this he knew,
saying instead:and the subconscious understanding that the sun brought light would mean that the absence of the sun would bring darkness does not surprise him.
saying instead:He remains curious about all things.
saying instead:He marvels at the red and pulsing glow of the embers of his fire.
saying instead:He wonders at the way the sun’s arrow disappearing colors the sky pink, purple, navy, black.
saying instead:He drinks in the way in which the color drains from the world.
saying instead:The first night of the week of feasting is the night of the full moon, which Lyut had known but had not understood,
saying instead:but now he does. He understands the moon and its importance when first it creeps into view of his clearing.
saying instead:He understands its beauty, and he weeps.
saying instead:He weeps for my creation, and I am filled with praise unclouded by words.
saying instead:Filled to overflowing as I have never been since Ýng created me at the beginning of all things.
saying instead:And that night is the night when Ýng comes to me and makes his decision.
saying instead:The next morning, a second strange occurrence greets Lyut when he opens his eyes.
saying instead:Sitting at the entrance to his cave is a creature very much like him in many ways,
saying instead:but in many ways different.
saying instead:Long and lithe, yes,
saying instead:strong and slender, yes, but shorter,
saying instead:and with fur of the purest white as opposed to the dark brown of his own.
saying instead:A face more slender and ears larger, and on the tip of his tail, the fur is dark black.
saying instead:“Who are you?” I smile to him.
saying instead:“It is I, faithful.
saying instead:It is Týw.” A look of confusion comes over his face, and I must hold back amusement as the fisher sits up and rubs his eyes,
saying instead:looking around as though the answers were to be found in the air itself.
saying instead:“Týw?” “Yes, faithful.” “I thought that the gods were too dear to be seen?”
saying instead:I close my eyes.
saying instead:I revel in the blackness this brings.
saying instead:I revel in the feeling of terror and the exaltation that come with being embodied.
saying instead:I revel in the power of our lord.
saying instead:“Yes, this is true.
saying instead:This has always been true through the long years and longer millennia.
saying instead:However, I was not completely honest with you yesterday, Lyut.”
saying instead:He frowns, staring intently at me in my new form.
saying instead:“If you are a god and you are holy,
saying instead:how can you lie?” “It was a lie by omission, for I am the god of water and of watching and of the moon and of death,
saying instead:but I am also a trickster god.
saying instead:I am the god who sows chaos while Ýng brings order.
saying instead:Forever we work together or strive against each other.
saying instead:Forever we move in a cycle.
saying instead:This is our very nature.
saying instead:This is the way of things, for Ýng must have something to strive against that time move forward
saying instead:and his creations grow and change with it.”
saying instead:Lyut sits cross-legged and bows his head as he thinks on this.
saying instead:He knows that, on some level, it must be true, for there are times when the weather is bad for days on end and he cannot —
saying instead:or could not — tell the difference between day and night,
saying instead:and there are times when he will go a week without food from the river, and once there was even a time when something happened to the water of his section of the stream that caused it to taste bitter and plant-like,
saying instead:and no amount of boiling could remove the flavor and he was sick with fever.
saying instead:“You sow chaos and Ýng fixes it?”
saying instead:“There is no fixing chaos, faithful.
saying instead:I sow chaos because that is who and what I am. Ýng
saying instead:brings order because that is what They are.
saying instead:There is no moral ground on which to judge the chaos that I sow,
saying instead:just as there is no judgement to be made on the order of our lord.
saying instead:Both are holy in their own way,
saying instead:because they are the chaos and order of gods”
saying instead:“Is the chaos of your servants not holy, then?”
saying instead:“It is not. It is my role in the world to sow chaos so that you may learn and become better for it,
saying instead:but when you sow chaos for each other,
saying instead:you lower yourselves in our eyes.”
saying instead:I see confusion on his face and sense questions in his mind, but he does not speak,
saying instead:so I continue. “The chaos sown by living beings is an exchange of power.
saying instead:Inevitable, perhaps, but it bespeaks a lack of devotion.”
saying instead:Lyut frowns as he considers this.
saying instead:I give my servant time,
saying instead:for he has learned more in the past day than any of his predecessors have in their spans.
saying instead:“So then,” he says at last.
saying instead:“How can I see you now?
saying instead:What are you?” “I am the god of watching and of water,
saying instead:of the moon and of death,
saying instead:and I am a trickster god, but all of these things are a part of the world separate from you.
saying instead:I am, this body is,
saying instead:the concrete manifestation of myself and I will take this form for a time.
saying instead:I am this concrete manifestation because I committed a concrete act by giving you sight,
saying instead:and the ramifications to me are also concrete.”
saying instead:“You made it so that I can see you?”
saying instead:“No, faithful. Ýng has made it so that you can see me,
saying instead:for They are my lord and I am Their servant,
saying instead:and I sowed chaos and They have in turn brought order to me.
saying instead:At least, for a while.”
saying instead:Lyut looks startled at this.
saying instead:“Is it a wicked thing that you have given me sight?
saying instead:Have you made us both unholy?”
saying instead:“No, faithful, dear Lyut.”
saying instead:I smile and hold up my hands.
saying instead:“It is good and holy that you may see,
saying instead:and Ýng agrees. However, They control the balance, and so they have decided that the balance,
saying instead:the exchange, for you seeing is for me to be seen.
saying instead:I will live for thirty years among the world in this embodied form,
saying instead:and you will find that the chaos that I bring is vastly reduced while I am here,
saying instead:for in this form, I cannot work my usual methods.”
saying instead:“Is that not a punishment,
saying instead:for a god to have their power lessened?”
saying instead:I laugh. “No, I do not think so. Ýng
saying instead:was at first angry with me and perhaps They wished at one point to punish me.
saying instead:But They understand now,
saying instead:and this is instead a matter of me experiencing what you experience in the way that only a god can,
saying instead:for gods must learn and change along with their servants.”
saying instead:He thinks for a long while on this,
saying instead:and I know that he is praying to Ýng throughout,
saying instead:that he is closing his eyes so that his hearing is sharper and his smell is more keen
saying instead:and perhaps his sense of the holy is as well.
saying instead:I do not interrupt his prayer,
saying instead:for Ýng is with both of us.
saying instead:I pray with him.
saying instead:We sit in silence in the cave and hear the wind and the stream and the birds,
saying instead:and we smell the cassia and cardamom and copal,
saying instead:and we share our prayers.
saying instead:“Týw,” he says at last.
saying instead:“I have faith in Ýng and I have faith in you that I will remain pure
saying instead:and that the world will remain pure with us.
saying instead:I do not understand,
saying instead:but I have faith.”
saying instead:“Good. Now, I will teach you to see, faithful,
saying instead:and you will teach me to be seen, for everything —
saying instead:everything — will be different now.”
saying instead:This was the second and final part of
saying instead:“Unseeing” by Madison Scott-Clary,
saying instead:read for you by the author herself. As always,
saying instead:you can find more stories on the web at thevoice.dog,
saying instead:or find the show wherever you get your podcasts.
saying instead:Thank you for listening
saying instead:to The Voice of Dog.
