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“Hi, I’m Jack and I’m Not From This World” by Dirt Coyote (read by the author)
Today’s story is “Hi, I’m Jack and I’m Not From This World” by Dirt Coyote, who, when he’s not causing trouble on Twitter, is writing short furry fiction. Follow Dirt Coyote on Twitter for future updates.
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https://thevoice.dog/episode/hi-im-jack-and-im-not-from-this-world-by-dirt-coyote-read-by-the-author
Transcript
You’re listening to The Voice of Dog,
Speaker:and Today’s story is
Speaker:“Hi, I’m Jack and I’m Not From This World”
Speaker:by Dirt Coyote, who,
Speaker:when he’s not causing trouble on Twitter,
Speaker:is writing short furry fiction.
Speaker:Follow Dirt Coyote on Twitter for future updates.
Speaker:Please enjoy “Hi, I’m Jack and I’m Not From This World”
Speaker:by Dirt Coyote, read for you by the author himself.
Speaker:I slap my paw on the table and shout,
Speaker:"And then Bethany says, 'What Sandwich?'"
Speaker:The entire group erupts in laughter as I finish my story.
Speaker:Kenneth, the elk in front of me, throws his head back so hard that his antlers bump against the wall behind him.
Speaker:My boyfriend wraps an arm around me tightly,
Speaker:and it feels good to have the husky by my side again.
Speaker:It feels like it's been years since I've been able to make people laugh that hard.
Speaker:The table winds down and a vixen nudges the elk's shoulder,
Speaker:"Hun, you're gonna get us kicked out again."
Speaker:"Yeah, yeah," he waves his hooves, trying to settle himself down.
Speaker:"I just forgot how funny Jack can be at times.
Speaker:times." I know what he means,
Speaker:though only slightly.
Speaker:The waitress comes around, a pug with a tablet out for us.
Speaker:"What drinks would you all be having?"
Speaker:She asks with a perky ring in her voice.
Speaker:I look up at her with a wide grin.
Speaker:"I'll take a Coke,"
Speaker:I say, and then immediately realize my mistake.
Speaker:So does the rest of the table.
Speaker:Everyone stops laughing, their eyes all on me.
Speaker:This happens every single time.
Speaker:I get ahead of myself and say something too fast and now everyone is confused.
Speaker:It's like I just unbuckled my pants and shat right in the middle of the table.
Speaker:"A what?" she asks, turning her eyes to the rest of the group in confusion.
Speaker:My boyfriend, Tre,
Speaker:touches a paw to my leg and mutters,
Speaker:"Jack?" I grab my menu, flipping open to the beverages and point at the one on top.
Speaker:"Ugh, sorry, I meant
Speaker:a Pepsi. I'd like
Speaker:a Diet Pepsi," I clarify.
Speaker:It's not actually the soda I want,
Speaker:but it's the only one that I recognize.
Speaker:The waitress eyes me a second longer before moving to the bear on my left,
Speaker:Dannon I learned.
Speaker:He's my best friend,
Speaker:I think, but it used to be Kenneth.
Speaker:"I think I’ll have a Cane,"
Speaker:he says, trying to act like nothing is off.
Speaker:I think that's the equivalent of a Coca-Cola,
Speaker:but I'm not really feeling adventurous enough to find out.
Speaker:Everyone else orders their drinks, and just as the pug leaves, the vixen,
Speaker:Trish I think, asks with her eyebrows raised,
Speaker:"Did you try to order cocaine from the waitress?"
Speaker:I wave my paws out in front of my chest.
Speaker:"No, no, sorry. I just
Speaker:got mixed up. Don't worry about it,"
Speaker:I say, knowing she's not worth the explanation.
Speaker:She's just the flavor of the month with how fast Kenneth goes through girls.
Speaker:"It's his condition," my boyfriend says,
Speaker:and I fold my ears back.
Speaker:I really wish he didn't,
Speaker:but Tre always likes to explain it so everyone's on the same page.
Speaker:"He was lost in the woods for half a year and so sometimes he gets the names of things mixed up.
Speaker:up." She nods her head up and down with some sympathy,
Speaker:and I feel a little guilty cause that's not the truth.
Speaker:It's just the explanation that makes sense to all of them.
Speaker:I kinda hate having to live with the lie,
Speaker:but I put on my smile and wave a paw.
Speaker:"Yeah, what he said.
Speaker:It's not a big deal."
Speaker:I try and blow past it as quickly as possible and the conversation starts up as normal again.
Speaker:It always feels like a close call, this whole lie I've constructed.
Speaker:See, I didn't get lost in any woods.
Speaker:No, about a month ago, I walked straight into them
Speaker:and knew exactly where to go cause a witch gave me a map.
Speaker:Alright, none of this is making any sense to you so lemme catch you up.
Speaker:Hi, I'm Jack, and I'm not from this world.
Speaker:I'm from your world,
Speaker:where I graduated from UC Berkeley with a degree in computer science
Speaker:and my favorite football team is the Packers.
Speaker:Not here though. See, I wanted to go to this world for some reasons I'd rather keep to myself,
Speaker:and in this world
Speaker:I'm not the meerkat that hates Disneyland and loves Buffalo Wild Wings.
Speaker:I walked through a cave and suddenly,
Speaker:I'm Jack that graduated from UC Golden,
Speaker:my football team is the High Kicks,
Speaker:and everyone drives on the left side of the road.
Speaker:That blows, but worth it.
Speaker:Trish leans in, not wanting to drop the conversation.
Speaker:"You poor thing. What was it like,
Speaker:being out there all by yourself?"
Speaker:Oh right, and this world’s Jack took a camping trip seven months ago
Speaker:and is probably dead.
Speaker:"Harrowing," I say flatly,
Speaker:and that's enough to change the subject.
Speaker:"We still on for Sunday?"
Speaker:Kenneth asks quickly,
Speaker:wrapping his arm over Trish's shoulder to try and bring her back in.
Speaker:"Hell yeah! Doug Riot's Wyldstar!"
Speaker:I confirm, and though I'm not actually a big fan of movies,
Speaker:spending time with Kenneth sounds good again.
Speaker:Back in my world,
Speaker:we fell out when I was being a depressed piece of shit.
Speaker:The bear, Dannon, leans in and taps his big claw on the table. "Uh,
Speaker:actually, I thought we were watching the High Kick's game on Sunday?"
Speaker:I cock my muzzle to the side,
Speaker:and then slap myself on the forehead.
Speaker:"Aw, shit, I did promise that,
Speaker:didn't I?" In the month I've been in this world, I’ve come to learn that Dannon is the guy I hung out with all the time.
Speaker:He's my old college roommate, I think,
Speaker:and kinda clingy as all fuck.
Speaker:I don't know what this dimension’s version of me sees in him,
Speaker:but he's been trying to hang out alone
Speaker:and I guess I owe former me that.
Speaker:Heck, this world’s Jack could still be out there in those woods
Speaker:and I don't wanna ruin what he had going.
Speaker:"Let's shoot for Saturday,"
Speaker:I promise Kenneth, and he
Speaker:nods. It must be a little weird with me wanting to spend so much time with him.
Speaker:We just seemed to be Facebook,
Speaker:I mean, Faceshare
Speaker:friends in this world.
Speaker:Tre, my wonderful boyfriend,
Speaker:leans in for a peck on my cheek.
Speaker:My Tre did that all the time too,
Speaker:usually before he wanted to tell me something.
Speaker:I peck him back the way I do.
Speaker:He's the one thing that's a mirror replica,
Speaker:the treasure the witch promised when she helped take me to this universe.
Speaker:"Don't forget, we're having dinner with my parents on Saturday,"
Speaker:he reminds me. Ugh,
Speaker:they're the same too,
Speaker:but that's no big deal.
Speaker:"We'll figure out something,"
Speaker:I promise Kenneth,
Speaker:but he looks a bit disheartened.
Speaker:How the fuck am I supposed to keep track of
Speaker:every new thing, and my schedule.
Speaker:It's kinda a chore.
Speaker:Saturday rolls around without too much excitement.
Speaker:I only mix up a few things throughout the week, but it's nothing crazy.
Speaker:My coworkers had to wheel me to the correct desk only once,
Speaker:and I call my phone an Android,
Speaker:which makes no fucking sense to anyone.
Speaker:"Still driving on the wrong side of the road?"
Speaker:Tre's mom asks in the mocking half-joke. half-putdown
Speaker:that she’s so good at.
Speaker:I pour my wine glass close to the brim.
Speaker:"All the way here,"
Speaker:I joke, trying not to let her ruin the mood. Tre's parents are dressed nice, something they like to do when they have company over.
Speaker:He made me put on a dress shirt too,
Speaker:even though I wanted to come in a t-shirt and flip flops.
Speaker:Even between dimensions,
Speaker:some things never change.
Speaker:"It's just part of his condition,"
Speaker:Tre says, always to my defense.
Speaker:I put on my smile and nod up and down.
Speaker:Tre's father coughs and shuffles in his seat.
Speaker:The husky is large
Speaker:and always intimidated me a little bit,
Speaker:but he says in his deep voice,
Speaker:"It's good to have you back,
Speaker:regardless." I kinda feel like it's a lie.
Speaker:They probably tried ushering Tre towards some bitch the day I didn't come back home.
Speaker:They always wanted grandkids, but me and Tre aren’t interested.
Speaker:At least I hope we still don't want any cubs.
Speaker:"I'm glad to be back. Missed
Speaker:eating real food,"
Speaker:I say, patting the little bulge that has grown over my tummy. His mom
Speaker:snickers at that, pointing over to me.
Speaker:"I bet. You were fur and bones when they found you.
Speaker:you." It's true. I stopped eating altogether back in my world,
Speaker:and when I think about it,
Speaker:it wasn't fair to let everyone watch me waste away.
Speaker:Turning to Tre's father, I quickly change the subject.
Speaker:"How's the firm holding up?
Speaker:Still protecting millionaires from tax evasion?"
Speaker:I joke, something I could do with him from time to time.
Speaker:It falls flat. His muzzle scrunches up,
Speaker:brow raising. "Firm?"
Speaker:Tre's mom leans back into her seat with the wine glass to her muzzle.
Speaker:"Here we go again,"
Speaker:she says before taking a loud sip.
Speaker:Tre darts a glare to his mom and says,
Speaker:"His condition—" If I have to hear about my condition one more time, I’m gonna lose it, so I interrupt,
Speaker:"Sorry. What is it
Speaker:you do again?" "State prosecutor.
Speaker:I make sure the millionaires don't evade their share,"
Speaker:he says bluntly, and I can see why my blunder rubbed him so wrong.
Speaker:"And I'm an astronaut, don't you know?"
Speaker:Tre’s mom jokes at my expense.
Speaker:My husky straightens himself out on the seat,
Speaker:saying in a strained tone,
Speaker:"Mother, that's not funny.
Speaker:You're a professor of Biology at Calitazs State.
Speaker:State." Biochem at the Stanford University,
Speaker:but I'm glad he said it so I couldn't mess that up to. Just little
Speaker:things that're off,
Speaker:and I feel bad for not doing my research.
Speaker:Like a fraud, cause that's what I am.
Speaker:Still, I put on my smile
Speaker:and nod like I belong here
Speaker:because I'm not going back.
Speaker:I let them do most of the talking and the rest of the night moves on rather smoothly.
Speaker:I can tell that my husky is putting on a show though.
Speaker:There's just something in the way that he talks that lets me know he's getting that much closer to the truth.
Speaker:I need to start doing better.
Speaker:I arrive at Dannon's house with a six pack of Sunnyvale,
Speaker:and I did my due diligence this time.
Speaker:It's the equivalent of the beer
Speaker:I used to drink, good ol Hefe,
Speaker:so I feel a little proud of myself.
Speaker:"Game day!" I shout as the bear opens the door for me.
Speaker:He gives a wide toothy smile at my cheeriness and says,
Speaker:"Guess you've been excited about this too, haven’t you?"
Speaker:Dannon leans in, gives me a brush on the whiskers, and I almost pull back.
Speaker:This world's me was a lot more affectionate than I was.
Speaker:I'd never be so intimate with my friends,
Speaker:but I go along with it
Speaker:and brush whiskers back.
Speaker:"It's the High Kicks against the Calitaza Miners. Of course I'm excited!"
Speaker:I lie. I'd much rather be watching Aaron Rodgers throw a laser thirty yards down the field,
Speaker:but the High Kick's stallion,
Speaker:Blee, seems to be good enough.
Speaker:Football is football
Speaker:and I'm gonna have fun anyways.
Speaker:"Yeah, I guess we can watch some sports after,"
Speaker:he says as he leads me in.
Speaker:I laugh cause I think he's joking.
Speaker:Games about to start in ten,
Speaker:and I'm not really sure what
Speaker:after is. I'm lead into the living room,
Speaker:noticing that there's no game day snacks,
Speaker:and that's a little disheartening.
Speaker:I'd have at least had some chips out if I was hosting a game.
Speaker:Plopping my beers on the table,
Speaker:I flop down into the couch and look expectantly at the TV.
Speaker:Dannon seems to know what I'm waiting for, so he takes a seat
Speaker:awfully close to me and grabs the remote.
Speaker:He flicks on the screen, flipping through the channels until he finds what he's looking for.
Speaker:My eyes grow wide, and I cough out.
Speaker:"This isn't the game?"
Speaker:No, it's certainly not.
Speaker:It's two foxes fucking like mad.
Speaker:Their moans of pleasure are
Speaker:blaring through the speakers,
Speaker:and the slap of one of the dudes
Speaker:balls is just loud enough to overcome it.
Speaker:"Oh god, oh god yes,"
Speaker:the one getting dicked screams out as he's beating his cock like it owed him
Speaker:money. "The fu—" Before I can finish my thought,
Speaker:there's a thick wet ursine tongue deep into my muzzle.
Speaker:It's running up against mine,
Speaker:his lips locked firmly to my face.
Speaker:A paw finds its way into my shirt,
Speaker:claws running through my fur straight to my nipples.
Speaker:I panic and pull back as hard as I can
Speaker:with my paws pushing against the bear's chest.
Speaker:"Holy fuck, dude?" I scream out, trying to back into a corner of the couch,
Speaker:but not getting far enough.
Speaker:He barely seems to register my discomfort as he forces another kiss against my lips.
Speaker:"Ohhhhh, I've missed this. C'mere you sweet fuck,"
Speaker:he mutters out as he gropes against my leg.
Speaker:"No!" I shout again, and this time push the big bear back with enough force to throw him down on his own couch.
Speaker:"What the fuck is this?"
Speaker:The foxes are so loud,
Speaker:I only realize now that he can barely hear me.
Speaker:He grabs the remote with some confusion and hits pause on the TV.
Speaker:I'd rather he just turn off the damn thing, cause now it's stuck on a close up of the foxes railing.
Speaker:Dannon says with some puzzlement.
Speaker:"What we always do when you come over for the game.
Speaker:Or is this part of your condition?"
Speaker:He asks with a grin.
Speaker:"Maybe? Yes? I don't wanna fuck you, if that's what I've been doing,"
Speaker:I spit out quickly.
Speaker:“Jack, you can drop the act. It’s just me,”
Speaker:Dannon says, and my heart sinks in my gut.
Speaker:He lets out a low lusty growl, desire still in his eyes.
Speaker:"You joined some sex cult out there in those woods.
Speaker:Got into the really freaky shit,
Speaker:didn’t ya?” I’m a little disturbed,
Speaker:but mostly relieved he’s wrong.
Speaker:“You’re always wanting to hang out with Kenneth nowadays.
Speaker:You fucking him too,
Speaker:little slut?" he asks,
Speaker:and not maliciously.
Speaker:It's twisted. Like I'm supposed to be getting off on the idea of fucking around behind Tre's back.
Speaker:Like I probably did.
Speaker:He's not reading me right at all,
Speaker:and he leans in again to run a claw right up my inner thigh.
Speaker:I hate it, because I know he knows exactly where to touch me.
Speaker:Only my Tre knew that spot.
Speaker:Blood rushes to my groin,
Speaker:my body betraying me.
Speaker:He doesn't get to touch me like that again.
Speaker:My fist swings wild, knocking him right on the nose.
Speaker:It sent the message home as he completely rolls to the other side of the couch.
Speaker:Paws are clutching his muzzle
Speaker:and I can see blood pour between his fingers.
Speaker:He says something like,
Speaker:"Fuck! My nose!" but I can't really make it out when slamming his front door behind me.
Speaker:I stomp towards my car,
Speaker:fist still clenched tightly.
Speaker:I practically scrape up my paint job trying to get the keys in the
Speaker:door. As soon as I get in, I'm out on the street. It's not until I almost run head first into another car
Speaker:that I realize I'm on the wrong side of the road again.
Speaker:There's a few blocks difference between me and Dannon's house before I pull
Speaker:over. Guilt builds up in my chest for hitting the bear the way I did.
Speaker:He should have stopped when I told him too,
Speaker:but I wasn't as angry at him
Speaker:as I am myself.
Speaker:This other me. How did he not know how special Tre was?
Speaker:How could another me have taken his husky for granted like that?
Speaker:He couldn't have understood the lengths I've gone to get back to Tre.
Speaker:A bad thought crosses my mind,
Speaker:glad that this world’s Jack
Speaker:went missing. It's not good, because I don't think anyone deserves to die.
Speaker:I want to go home, but I can't.
Speaker:It would look too suspicious and I got the jitters anyways.
Speaker:I'm such an awful liar,
Speaker:I have no idea how Tre hasn't found out already.
Speaker:My first thought is to go to a bar and watch the game there,
Speaker:but football is ruined for me at the moment.
Speaker:Then I remember Kenneth,
Speaker:my actual friend.
Speaker:The elk agrees to see Wildstar with me.
Speaker:I'm glad that we can just sit in the cool movie theater.
Speaker:It gives me time to collect myself.
Speaker:The explosions distract me,
Speaker:and by the time we walk out,
Speaker:I’m feeling a little better.
Speaker:Kenneth points at a shop, some chain called BlueTops.
Speaker:It’s sorta like Starbucks where I’m from,
Speaker:but everyone drinks hot cider instead of coffee around here.
Speaker:I think it’s gross,
Speaker:but I do wanna chat with him,
Speaker:so I agree. "How was the football game?"
Speaker:Kenneth asks casually,
Speaker:and it's a little bit of a surprise to me.
Speaker:"Oh, uh, I didn't end up watching it,"
Speaker:I say, and I guess with us not being friends in this universe,
Speaker:he wasn't interested in football,
Speaker:else he would have known that.
Speaker:Maybe I should have asked my Kenneth if he ever really liked watching the games with me.
Speaker:He cocks an eyebrow and asks,
Speaker:"Did something happen with you and Dannon?"
Speaker:There's a lump in my throat.
Speaker:I want to tell him everything,
Speaker:the way I'd tell my Kenneth,
Speaker:but he’s not him
Speaker:and I don’t want to dump everything on him.
Speaker:"I don't think I want to hangout with him anymore,"
Speaker:I admitted, and that was mostly the truth.
Speaker:He nods, pulling up his cider to his muzzle and taking a sip.
Speaker:There's a little bit of an awkward silence so I blurt out,
Speaker:"How's things with Trish?"
Speaker:The elk snorts, the steam coming off the drink blowing all over the place.
Speaker:"We split up. She had too many issues with my rack,
Speaker:and truthfully, I wasn’t a big fan of hers either,"
Speaker:he said, waving his hooves in circles.
Speaker:I laugh, "Same ol' Kenneth.
Speaker:Always on the hunt for something better.
Speaker:better." As I finish, I take a big sip of my cinnamon apple cider
Speaker:and try my best not to wrinkle my muzzle.
Speaker:I don’t know how they do it here,
Speaker:but they replaced ketchup with buffalo sauce, so,
Speaker:I guess it’s a fair trade.
Speaker:His brow goes up,
Speaker:but his smile doesn't fade.
Speaker:"You say that like we know each other.
Speaker:This is the most I've seen you in years," he states,
Speaker:though it's not a challenge.
Speaker:"Why did we never hang out?
Speaker:You're awesome," I say, because I'm still not sure what happened in this universe.
Speaker:He scratches his chin with his hoof, looking at me shyly.
Speaker:"I guess I never was your type?
Speaker:Your friends usually seem to be more
Speaker:your speed," he says carefully,
Speaker:skirting around the issue and it finally clicks with me.
Speaker:I wasn't— this Jack wasn't friends with someone unless they were sleeping together.
Speaker:And it was a dirty secret
Speaker:that everyone knew.
Speaker:Man, I was such a loser in this world cause Kenneth is the best.
Speaker:Well, I guess I am a loser in my own world too,
Speaker:cause I let my Kenneth go as well.
Speaker:That wasn't going to happen again.
Speaker:I lean over and say with a smile,
Speaker:"I'd like us to spend time together more.
Speaker:You watch football?" Coming home,
Speaker:I'm feeling a lot better.
Speaker:Kenneth agrees to come over next Sunday so I can teach him about the game.
Speaker:I also make a note to pick out some movies to watch together,
Speaker:because this Kenneth seems to enjoy doing that.
Speaker:No foxes fucking on the TV this time.
Speaker:I open the door to my house,
Speaker:and hear Tre call me from the basement.
Speaker:I get to the top of the stairs and knock on the open door.
Speaker:"You down here babe?"
Speaker:I ask, slowly descending the steps.
Speaker:"Yeah! Come down here.
Speaker:I wanna show you something,"
Speaker:he calls back, and I can hear him
Speaker:fiddling with things.
Speaker:It's dimly lit down here, and I can see him in a corner with some bikes on the rack.
Speaker:"What're you up to, hun?"
Speaker:He doesn't turn around as he continues messing with the bikes.
Speaker:"Just looking at old pictures of us at Cinderland.
Speaker:We look so goofy in the photos.
Speaker:You remember that?"
Speaker:He says chipperly.
Speaker:Ugh, another thing different.
Speaker:I know Cinderland enough from the ads to know it's Disneyland and I
Speaker:hate that place. Not only was this me a cheating bastard,
Speaker:but he was also one of those
Speaker:Disney nuts. I'd never willingly go to that shithole.
Speaker:I roll my eyes and put on my best smile.
Speaker:"Oh yeah. That was a lot of fun.
Speaker:Can't wait to go back,"
Speaker:I say, and it's hard for me to keep that same cheery tone. "Photos in the desk,"
Speaker:he says, but his voice sounds a little different.
Speaker:I turn to the desk, and it's not my Dad's cherrywood,
Speaker:but a blocky metal workstation.
Speaker:I pull open the long drawer handle and freeze as I see nothing inside at all.
Speaker:I turn to face the husky and say,
Speaker:"Um, hun, there's nothing in—
Speaker:oh." Whelp, this is different.
Speaker:My Tre didn't own a gun.
Speaker:But now this Tre was pointing one right at me,
Speaker:paws shaking. Tears are running down the sides of his face
Speaker:and his muzzle is twisted in an angry frown.
Speaker:"Hun—" "Don't you fucking Hun me.
Speaker:I don't know who you are,
Speaker:but my Jack would never go to Cinderland.
Speaker:My Jack hates that place,
Speaker:but you wouldn't know that cause you're not him,"
Speaker:he says, legs spread like he's bracing himself for the gun to go off any second.
Speaker:My heart's pounding,
Speaker:and I slowly raise my paws over my head.
Speaker:He's shaking so bad,
Speaker:it's just as likely he's gonna shoot me on accident as much as he is on purpose.
Speaker:Not gonna lie, but a little wee comes out.
Speaker:"My condition—" "STOP IT,"
Speaker:he barks, thrusting the pistol forward.
Speaker:"Stop lying! You're so fucking bad at it,
Speaker:and I'm done lying for you.
Speaker:you." He's been taken way past the edge,
Speaker:and It's killing me to see him so distressed.
Speaker:I should've known he could see right through me.
Speaker:My Tre always could,
Speaker:and I shouldn't have expected any different.
Speaker:"It's not what you think,"
Speaker:I start, my heart breaking as I'm forced to admit the truth.
Speaker:"But I'm not your Jack."
Speaker:"I knew it! I knew it from the start that you weren't him!
Speaker:And you just lied to me
Speaker:and took advantage of me,"
Speaker:he says, fang sinking so hard in his lip that he's drawing blood.
Speaker:"Who the fuck are you?
Speaker:What the fuck are you?
Speaker:Are you some furwalker?
Speaker:Some sort of demon?"
Speaker:I gulp loudly and try to explain all at once,
Speaker:"I'm Jack, but I'm not from here.
Speaker:A witch gave me directions to this cave where I—"
Speaker:"I swear to God," Tre says, and grips his pistol tighter.
Speaker:My muzzle cracks,
Speaker:I can't hold anything back
Speaker:because I don't want to say it.
Speaker:I don't want to relive it.
Speaker:The lengths I've gone to escape that hell.
Speaker:I don't want to say it,
Speaker:but he deserves the truth
Speaker:and so I shout through a sob.
Speaker:"It was you!" His maw opens
Speaker:and there's a look of complete puzzlement on his muzzle.
Speaker:He's about to speak,
Speaker:but I snort up snot
Speaker:and explain. "Where I'm from,
Speaker:you went on that camping trip seven months ago.
Speaker:Not me. And when you left
Speaker:you just—" I choke down mucus building up in my throat.
Speaker:"You just vanished"
Speaker:"I spent months in those mountains looking for you.
Speaker:Every time the rangers went out,
Speaker:I was there. All the money we saved was spent on private expeditions when everyone else gave up.
Speaker:I stopped eating.
Speaker:I stopped sleeping.
Speaker:I stopped talking. People
Speaker:couldn't even stand to look at me anymore.
Speaker:I got so desperate,
Speaker:I started going to psychics and paranormal shit for help.
Speaker:Anything just to have you back.
Speaker:back." I fall into the workbench, and drag the back of my paw over my eyes.
Speaker:He's barely visible through my tears.
Speaker:I can tell he's still got the pistol out,
Speaker:but it's pointed slightly downward.
Speaker:There's a small sniffling as he tries to work out everything I've said.
Speaker:He shakes his head back and forth before he says,
Speaker:"It scares me like nothing else.
Speaker:Since you've been back,
Speaker:you've told me nothing but lies.
Speaker:lies." I brace myself, thinking it might be it for me,
Speaker:but he finishes, "You're such an
Speaker:awful liar, but I think for the first time, you're telling me the truth.
Speaker:Or whatever you think the truth is.
Speaker:is." I let out a small sigh of relief
Speaker:and hold out my paw towards him.
Speaker:"I'm sorry I lied,
Speaker:but I'm telling you the truth now
Speaker:and truthly, I want you to put down the gun
Speaker:so we can just talk about this."
Speaker:Tre looks down at the pistol like he hadn't realized he'd whipped one out on me.
Speaker:He scoffs, rolls his eyes,
Speaker:and then tosses it my direction.
Speaker:I panic, floundering as it goes sailing through the air.
Speaker:I cup out both paws,
Speaker:bracing myself for it to go off and take a finger with it.
Speaker:It clanks softly against my paw pads,
Speaker:lighter than I expect it to be.
Speaker:Only when I feel the slosh of water do I realize that it's not a real gun.
Speaker:In fact, looking at it close up,
Speaker:it's pretty obvious it's a squirt toy.
Speaker:I look up at him and he takes a step back,
Speaker:ears red hot with embarrassment.
Speaker:The husky's lip is quivering as he whispers,
Speaker:"I'm sorry. All I
Speaker:wanted was the truth.
Speaker:truth." I set the squirt gun behind me,
Speaker:but I'm a little afraid to approach Tre.
Speaker:His muzzle is to the ground,
Speaker:like he did something wrong.
Speaker:I mean, it wasn't very nice that he pointed a gun at me,
Speaker:but I guess I kinda had it coming.
Speaker:"Sorry, for all the lying. I thought if I stayed here long enough,
Speaker:you'd never notice,"
Speaker:I admit. He rubs his eye, letting out a small pitiful laugh.
Speaker:"You've always been a
Speaker:bad liar. He was always a bad liar too:
Speaker:About Dannon, the other guys, football, and all that.
Speaker:that." My ears go up, and I feel some collateral guilt from what he just said.
Speaker:"You knew he was cheating on you?
Speaker:And you stayed with him anyways?"
Speaker:His legs wobble before he can't even hold himself up anymore.
Speaker:He takes a weary step back,
Speaker:thumping against the wall and slowly sliding down it.
Speaker:When he's on the floor with his head between his knees,
Speaker:he says. "I knew.
Speaker:You used— he used to think he was so sly,
Speaker:but I always knew.
Speaker:He wouldn't even know the scores when he said he was out watching football.
Speaker:But I stayed cause losing you—
Speaker:him—" He pauses to look up at me,
Speaker:and I feel connected with him in an
Speaker:awful way. The way that I never stopped looking in those
Speaker:damn woods. I gave up my friends, my life,
Speaker:my family just for the sheer hope of seeing him one last time.
Speaker:What we shared was the inability to let go,
Speaker:and I see it in his eyes like he sees it in mine.
Speaker:"I guess it doesn't matter anymore,"
Speaker:he starts, waving a paw lazily around.
Speaker:"I lost him anyways,
Speaker:and he's never coming back."
Speaker:It's the words he needs to say,
Speaker:just as much as the words I need to hear.
Speaker:Cause truthfully,
Speaker:my Tre is gone too.
Speaker:My Tre is never coming back.
Speaker:For the first time ever,
Speaker:I have to accept that.
Speaker:So I walk over, pick a spot close,
Speaker:and get down on the ground with him.
Speaker:It feels like we just stay there in silence for hours.
Speaker:Maybe it is, because there's a million things for me to think of doing next.
Speaker:I could probably go back and find that cave again.
Speaker:Repair things with my Kenneth,
Speaker:make things right in my world.
Speaker:Not everyone gets a second chance like this,
Speaker:so instead I say.
Speaker:"I don't know what happened to your Jack,
Speaker:and I don't know what happened to my Tre.
Speaker:They just disappeared,
Speaker:and I don't think they're coming back,"
Speaker:I say, then lift my head and turn towards him.
Speaker:He's done the same,
Speaker:and our noses are just a few inches from each other.
Speaker:He's not crying anymore, though
Speaker:his eyes are red.
Speaker:"But what I do know
Speaker:is that you're the only Tre I have left,
Speaker:and I think I might be the last of me that exists.
Speaker:So how about this?"
Speaker:I gulp, and hold out a paw towards him.
Speaker:"Hi, I'm Jack, and I'm not from this world.
Speaker:world." He laughs, cause it does sound a little goofy.
Speaker:I could always make my Tre laugh unintentionally,
Speaker:and it gives me confidence I can make this one laugh like that too.
Speaker:He doesn't take my paw yet,
Speaker:so I continue, "I like Buffalo Wild Wings,
Speaker:though, I have no idea what you call it here.
Speaker:I hate Cinderland,
Speaker:but we call it Disneyland where I came from"
Speaker:"Kenneth was my best friend,
Speaker:and I didn't hang out with anyone named Dannon.
Speaker:I actually watched football when I said that's what I was doing.
Speaker:I wasn't perfect,
Speaker:but not once did I ever cheat on my Tre,
Speaker:and I promise I would never cheat on you either,"
Speaker:I say, and it starts to make my eyes water thinking about the things this Tre has gone through.
Speaker:He looks at my paw,
Speaker:thinking about it for a minute,
Speaker:before his eyes turn up to mine in a stern look.
Speaker:"No more lies?" It's a big promise to keep,
Speaker:but I've gone too far to turn back now. I nod
Speaker:and repeat, "No more lies.
Speaker:lies." With a sigh, he reaches out
Speaker:and clasps my paw.
Speaker:"Hi Jack. It's nice to meet you.
Speaker:My name is Tre. Welcome to my world."
Speaker:This was “Hi, I’m Jack
Speaker:and I’m Not From This World”
Speaker:by Dirt Coyote, read for you by the author himself.
Speaker:You can find more stories on the web at thevoice.dog,
Speaker:or find the show wherever you get your podcasts.
Speaker:Thank you for listening
Speaker:to The Voice of Dog.
